View Full Version : You little-dicked gays like it in the butt

Art Vandelay
07-19-2011, 08:31 PM

A Very Important Study On The Penis Size Of Gay Men

Lane Moore — The National Institutes of Health recently did a study to find out how penis size affects the sexual health of gay men.

What did they find out? Oh, so many things! Such as:

Those who felt they had an inadequate penis are more likely to be psychologically troubled and anal receptive—or "bottoms"—while those with larger penises usually identify themselves as "tops."

But there had to have been someone who thought this may not be the best use of taxpayer money in the current economy...right? Right?

The National Development and Research Institutes received taxpayer money from the NIH to conduct the study, beginning in 2006. The NDRI has received funding from taxpayers since 1985 for "behavioral science research on drug abuse, AIDS, and crime," and the penis study reportedly fit into that category.

"We've got nameless, faceless bureaucrats who thought this was a good use of taxpayer money," says the president of the Traditional Values Coalition. "[They] seem to think the American taxpayers are a limitless ATM machine."

Well, that may be true. But certainly this study is of use to someone? We're sure there are some pretty happy horndogs at the NIH right now.

food for thought
07-19-2011, 08:35 PM

fucking faggit researchers with nothing better to study apparently

07-19-2011, 08:59 PM

why are reading let alone posting "Very important studies about gay men's penis sizes"?

Are you trying to put FMJ out of work?

07-19-2011, 10:04 PM
It's ok if he wants to do the stories.

I traditionally focus on the gay pictures.

07-20-2011, 03:23 AM
So basically, you were googling "cocks" when you "came across" the article of Ramon and his bangbus van of zoo animals; now this. Roosters on the mind?


07-20-2011, 08:02 AM
what i would like to know is why id i pay for this study

yeah tax dollars paid for this study

If you’re wondering where your tax dollars are going, we have two words for you: penis size.
No, no, no. The Obama administration isn’t investing in the infrastructure of novelty penis pumps and Joe Biden has barely begun to appear in late night infomercials for enhancement pills. Some recent whistleblowing by The Traditional Values Coalition, rather, has revealed that the National Institutes of Health granted nearly one million dollars in a single year to “institutional waste,” including a dire, imperative investigation called “The Association Between Penis Size and Sexual Health Among Men Who Have Sex with Men.”
Yes, the US might be trillions in debt, but at least we now know — in inches — how healthy, sexually, the gay men in America are.
Hard to swallow? We agree.
The Traditional Values Coalition says nearly $900,000 in government funding went towards a slew of pointless studies in a single year, with $9.4 million being invested in the penis research, among others, in a period of a decade.
The exact amount spent on that study in particular was not made available by the Coalition, but even a penny towards penises might be too much for a country where the dollar is diminishing, unemployment continues to skyrocket and experts are predicting another Great Depression.
Then again, would you rather your tax dollars go towards a heavy-handed inquiry on the relationship of phallic measurements and sexual health or a military operation in Libya? Make love not war, they say, right? If only we could choose…
The Daily Mail reports that more than 1,000 gay and bisexual men from New York City made off with movie vouchers in exchange for making their mark on some measuring tape — for the sake of science, of course.
President of the Traditional Values Coalition Andrea Lafferty tells the Daily Mail what most of America is thinking: 'This country is broke and we cannot spend money on this kind of stuff.”
“We’ve got nameless, faceless bureaucrats who thought this was a good use of taxpayer money,” says Lafferty, who adds, “but, at the end of the day, it was the NIH directors who signed off on it. These nameless, faceless bureaucrats seem to think the American taxpayers are a limitless ATM machine.”
Or maybe those faceless bureaucrats are just some twisted penis freaks?
“We're spending money on wacky stuff,” adds Lafferty. “The president has said he's going to hunt down waste. Well, I'm going to give it to him on a platter.”
Professor Jeffrey Parsons of Hunter College tells Fox News that the taxpayer money didn’t necessarily go towards the measuring up involved in the study, but rather on the essential, scientific analysis and writing-up of the findings.
And that tax dollar funded write-up? Well, it lets the world know that men with average penises are versatile in the sack. Yup. Tops or bottoms, catching or receiving. The world is their oyster.

face it

Republicans watch fox
Democrats watch MSNBC
independent watch huffington post and NPR CNn
libertarians watch RT

no one like unbiased news

07-29-2011, 10:07 PM