View Full Version : punchline appreciation thread

04-12-2006, 06:20 PM
ive decided to make a thread where u can post punchlines u think are funny or creative, ill start

u could be quck, jump the candle stick,
burn ur back, fuck jill on a hill, but u still aint jack! - eminem

04-12-2006, 07:09 PM
nice idea, here some:

"Need a rhyme dictionary, to rehearse his lines
Sound like oscar the grouch with them nursery rhymes" - Game

"These leaders of the free world rookies, lookie
how can 6 dicks be pussies?" - 8 mile

"You rappin for doe packin shows, Mook get the hell out
you might as well be yourself, least you know you a fuckin sell out!" - Lux

"Now you talk gangster, but this partners lien
aint you the nigga that used to get smacked in art and design?!"-Murda Mook

"Im whats real, run up on you dump them 3's
you pussy, its that time of the month to bleed!" - Murda Mook

"You immature, just like your measly flow,
This nigga here? Government bread, easy do!" - Murda Mook

I know this threads gonna be filled with big l lines so ill only drop one

"So you better leave L alone..
Before i reach out and touch you, but not with a telephone"

04-12-2006, 07:16 PM
"So you better leave L alone..
Before i reach out and touch you, but not with a telephone"

i never got that one

04-12-2006, 07:29 PM
Vakill has too many punches, but to name a few:

Some of yall riding dick and dont know it, like a date rape drug

Pussy fall in my lap like a strip club full of clumsy crippled bitches

I'll leave ya stuck on stupid like you had a retarded conjoined twin

Tattooed F-U-N on my dick for 'Fuck U Niggaz' while I poke fun at ya bitches

Vakill like Columbians sittin' in a circle, my name has a 'dope ring' to it

I flash brilliance in the form of the naked truth and make Albert Einstein throw me Mardi Gras Beads

And last year niggas albums did more flopping than a Vlade Divac season

So many makaveli mini mes in the game it’s a fucking outbreak in small Pac’s (small pox)

The Flow Rings Bells but aint Nan Nigga seeing me like Ding Dong Ditch

everytime lightbulbs pop over my head the roaches run across the dark walls of my sanity

ya couldnt make headlines with raised eyebrows

Im in a class all by myself, like a bitched up tutor hiding from columbine shooters.

Got they backs against the wall like a straight nigga's ass in gay clubs.

When it comes to my rap status, I'm a cut above you pussies like a C-Section.

Nine times out of ten when you see me, I'm stroking pussy like Inspector Gadget's villain.

04-12-2006, 07:44 PM
you know the saying "Keep in touch"?

aaah now i see,thx

04-12-2006, 08:00 PM
Ah you jacked my Vakill one goddamn it, I was gonna do the C-section one.

"These homo's been in the closet for so long I'ma donate 'em to Salvation Army" Chino XL

"If I wanted to hear from the asshole I would've farted" Ras Kass

Deity Allah
04-12-2006, 08:02 PM
L had too many put here are a couple of my favorites:

I use to have beef with this theif named Randolph;
Now he's in a casket dressed up with his hands crossed!

I'm placing snitches inside lakes and ditches;
And if I catch aids then imma start raping bitches

I'm known for snatching purses and bombing churches;
I get more pussy by accident than most niggaz get on purpose

I told him give the dough before he got smoked;
Oh you broke? (BOOM BOOM) now you dead broke!

04-12-2006, 08:03 PM
mf doom has vicious punches man

"quick to cut a square like a sicilian"-mf

"spit it like raw grits, get it"-viktor vaughn

"who rock the house like rock and roll
got more soul than a sock wit a hole"- madvillain

when i remeber more..ill post

King Justice
04-12-2006, 08:23 PM
Sean Comb-ed through the evidence, just to get a clue

04-12-2006, 09:21 PM
''You bark like a pitbull,bite like a shitzu,breath smellin' like my dick do,your girl musta kissed you..'' - Pack FM9:|6

the surgeon
04-12-2006, 09:25 PM
like short sleaves i bear arms-jay z

the surgeon
04-12-2006, 09:35 PM
and mad hoes ask beavis i get nothing butt head-big l
no son but trust me i know how 2 raise a gun-jay-z
flier than s piece of paper bearing my name-jayz

04-13-2006, 10:25 AM
"A tech 9 is my utensil, fillin niggaz with so much lead, they can use they dick for a pencil" - Big L

"Half Hitler, half Jewish, i gassed out myself" - Ras Kass

04-13-2006, 05:36 PM
you could date a stick of dynamite and still woudlnt go out with a bang - eminem

04-13-2006, 09:25 PM
Chino XL is the punchline champion

"My multi-topical written flows containing subjects that vary,
but still all relative like West Virginian's before they marry"

04-13-2006, 11:21 PM
I Got Mad Hoes. Ask Beavis I Get Nothing But-head--big L

Crazy K
04-13-2006, 11:50 PM
I'll have you spellin iverson when i'm done
Cause i'll put you on the IV, in the ER SON

-40 Cal

04-14-2006, 12:03 AM
Clockwise im glockwise shootin caps "WATCH 'n' time kill you"....

mc wigglz PUNCHKYNG

04-14-2006, 12:42 AM
My karma's the comma that puts you inside of a coma
Hyphen, dot dot, semi-colon, leave you semi-swollen
Question mark. You pregnant?
Oh you're not. I love you, period.

Chino XL.

04-14-2006, 12:44 AM
I'm harder than me tryin to park a Dodge
When I'm drunk as fuck
Right next to a humungous truck
In a two car garage.


Definitive X
04-14-2006, 01:04 AM
"I'll have the letters on ya FUBU shirt stand for Fucked Up By Us"
-Chino XL
"Hit the stage hard, and drop bombs like bad comics"
"In this industry, I'm tryin' not to get fucked like 2Pac in jail"
-Chino XL
"Always walk crooked, you fuckers could never follow me/Only find cats sicker than D in leper colonies"

04-14-2006, 08:52 AM
"These niggaz couldn't be stars if they were thrown by chinese ninjas" - Chino XL

"Battling Chino is like Africa, niggaz talk about it but don't really wanna go there" - Chino XL

04-16-2006, 05:38 AM
And while you're at work, i'll feed your bitch a sloppy dick /
I got a hard drive, your man got a floppy disc /
the only time you have safe sex and be felt /
is if you jacked off in a car wearing a seatbelt - Celph Titled

The Rubix Cuban's at your door but I ain't singing no carols /
i'm like Donkey Kong, I got you niggas dodging my barrels - Celph Titled


Iron Man
04-16-2006, 09:43 AM
Tryna be me, now LL stands for:
Lower Level, Lack Lustre,
Last Least, Limp Lover
Lousy Lame, Latent Lethargic
Lazy Lemon, Little Logic
Lucky Leech, Liver Lipped
Laborious Louse from the Losers Lips
Live in Limbo, Lyrical Lapse
Low Life, with the Loud raps boy - Kool Moe Dee

04-16-2006, 09:51 AM
i heard your single, you better make a whole new song
if they said that shit is hot then they told you wrong
clown niggaz, you ain't got a chance at all
Big L Corleone too advanced for y'all
i make moves and boss all across the world
so don't be upset if I toss your girl

Fall Back - Big L

comes very dope at the beginninig of the track, love it

04-16-2006, 02:49 PM
Tryna be me, now LL stands for:
Lower Level, Lack Lustre,
Last Least, Limp Lover
Lousy Lame, Latent Lethargic
Lazy Lemon, Little Logic
Lucky Leech, Liver Lipped
Laborious Louse from the Losers Lips
Live in Limbo, Lyrical Lapse
Low Life, with the Loud raps boy - Kool Moe Dee

thats no punch, even tho i love the what mo dee does with the l's and i think lets go is one of the best disses

MF Viktor Herbz
04-16-2006, 04:03 PM

"he made a move a move tried to assist it,
listen kid, yo, you was born to be a pawn but im a bishop"

04-16-2006, 06:02 PM
i beat my dick and bust off in yo eye so u can see me comin - dmx

4-Bar Killer
04-16-2006, 07:12 PM
Son when I let off you meet your Lord and shepherd
Bloody money gets niggaz deaded and wetted
Don't forget it, money's the metal and my hand is magnetic - B1

4-Bar Killer
04-16-2006, 07:37 PM
MC Ren, one of the most underrated mc's in my opinion, also had great punchlines.. His verses in Real Niggaz was just ridiculous, fx:

You can run, but you can't hide, you know I'ma find ya,
Cause a nigga like Ren's only two steps behind ya.
Don't look back because you're shaking and all scared,
A nigga in black can be your scariest nightmare.
So sleep with the lights on, forget that the mic's on,
Don't step on the motherfucking stage without Nike's on.
Don't see a psycho, and then you just might go,
Mentally fucked up when I let the rifle blow.

the surgeon
04-16-2006, 09:46 PM
getting that ass kicked like ramadam its the rap phenomenen non dadda fuck pappa-BIG

04-16-2006, 09:55 PM
If it's about the boldest, I'm the most
I'm the coldest since winter
To make you stop the tape and "Inspec-tha-Deck" like you down with the RZA


04-16-2006, 11:01 PM
heavy hitter like i got a fetish for fat bitches!

i could be here all day..

04-17-2006, 01:39 AM
Go back upstairs, eat your mac cheese and fishsticks
You not 50, you gon' die tryin' to get rich.

C-Rayz Walz.

04-17-2006, 10:44 AM
smoke crack and shar ya'll, spare balls
plus i choke cats like hairballs-Dusk

04-17-2006, 12:25 PM
In my eyes I'm the illest emcee spittin'
Leavin' all of you cats shittin' kittens.