Little text - Credit wanted!

[Gubbi]

Yo, this is some shit i wrote down about the facts of me, and what i belive in.. Credit please :)

Everyday i see the same face, motherfuckers get in the race/
I don’t pretend to be somebody that i ain’t/
I aint a present but i know who i am, so be a pimp? Bitch i cant/
I wear dirty baggys that’s the way, to day and tomorrow too/
This is my words this is what i do, problem? Well fuck you/
I ain’t gonna give up, i don’t say stop i keep doing hole-in-one’s/
I ain’t Donna, but i live up the life, and i hate cheap lunch and guns/
I am gonna be the man, well i do what i can, and i love The Young Ones/(english television show/
Fuck my lines? That would be like diss Butsa Rhymes, times up/
I scream louder than heavy metal, so get back to your day job/
I’m have nothing against black people, i hate George Bush and his evil/
I hate discrimination, i hate the KKK-orginasation – Fuck ‘em!/
I wait a 100 years, to see tears from you, but when i do i say: Love ‘em!/

[Gubbi]

The Young Ones = English Television Show!

[Mr:Merrick]

Everyday i see the same face, motherfuckers get in the race/
I don’t pretend to be somebody that i ain’t/
I aint a present but i know who i am, so be a pimp? Bitch i cant/
I wear dirty baggys that’s the way, to day and tomorrow too/
This is my words this is what i do, problem? Well fuck you/


those lines are awsome yo, the ryme words maybe where a bitt cheap but still quite great.. peace

[Gubbi]

Hey thanks dude!

[Classic]

Everyday i see the same face, motherfuckers get in the race/
(Nice attempt at a opener, but this didn't end-rhyme with anything.)
I don’t pretend to be somebody that i ain’t/
I aint a present but i know who i am, so be a pimp? Bitch i cant/
(Half-rhyme for the end-rhyme here. Good though.)
I wear dirty baggys that’s the way, to day and tomorrow too/
This is my words this is what i do, problem? Well fuck you/
("Today", a single word. Okay here.)
I ain’t gonna give up, i don’t say stop i keep doing hole-in-one’s/
I ain’t Donna, but i live up the life, and i hate cheap lunch and guns/
I am gonna be the man, well i do what i can, and i love The Young Ones/
(Kinda stretched out at the end here. Good here.)
Fuck my lines? That would be like diss Butsa Rhymes, times up/
(This didn't end-rhyme with anything. Not a good line either.)
I scream louder than heavy metal, so get back to your day job/
(Look above, except this line was good..)
I’m have nothing against black people, i hate George Bush and his evil/
(Same.)
I hate discrimination, i hate the KKK-orginasation – Fuck ‘em!/
I wait a 100 years, to see tears from you, but when i do i say: Love ‘em!/
(Good closer.)


This was a subpar drop. It could've been better if you used better creativity, and topics. You also had a choppy flow since the end-rhymes were messin' it up for me. Just keep workin' on it.

[Gubbi]

Yeah yeah, thanks dude. I will work on it :)

Thanks both of you.