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Iron Mantis
06-06-2006, 12:48 PM
Wuts good,
This is Iron Mantis aka Mr Nims. Im a huge Wu Head, and obsessed with hip hop music and culture overall so I been writin a lot of shit lately. I haven't been able to get any decent beats for them so if anyone feels these and has skills producin then let me know.

Ganja got my mind whirrling, I'm cyclin through my life and times
fightin for some right from crimes and recitin to enlighten minds,
I'm strikin the cypher's spine and ignitin the mic with rhymes
cuz I write with the right design that's unlike any type or kind
and they get tighter and ripe with time just like any type of wine
Mantis be rippin the mic to shreds with knowledge and insight combined
so any day any night it's fine I come like Wu and Spit Ruckus
my crew consists of hundreds that's ruthless and hits suckas
till they useless and split hung up all toothless with thick studders
A nuisance that spits thunder yo I'm shootin the best gunners
reputed to get under skin fluid like thick blubber
a boozer and sex lover I grew with intense come up
influence from KRiS-1 son my music is sick brotha
my brain it be gettin huge while the stupid just get dumber
the truth is I just run over dudes like a big hummer
my word's leave geniuses confused to just wonder

That's just one piece of a verse, I got a lot more, just let me know what you think.

Iron Mantis
06-07-2006, 10:47 PM
my mind bubbles like the swords my lyrical acid consumes
and it holds critical secrets like Mary Magdeline's tomb//
Releasing toxic gasses and fumes to ravage the room,
witchcraft'll rip through fabric with brooms and magic of moons//
I'm sick of raps about crashin ya crew and snatchin ya boo
cuz rappin the truth'll make you crumble like the crackers in soup//
I don't even write rhymes they spill like oil natural and crude
Refine em with beats to match till they fantastic and new//
I'm hazardous to ya stealth because my optical is spottin you
I cause no other option but bombardment when i'm knockin you//
Constantly I got pockets full of cartons bowls and lots of tropical
and I got a noggin full of knowledge and patients like a hospital//
My logic is unstoppable as it grows emergin in signs,
and I'm determined to find every single word in my mind//
blurt them out without thinking and conserve them refined
and then disperse them in lines of pages in verses and rhymes//

get at me with some feedback

Bigot Hitman
06-07-2006, 11:00 PM
I got discourged when is saw how long they were, but the parts i read was good.

Raptica
06-18-2006, 04:36 PM
ya vocabulary is accually gud, but som parts were not the best
ya flow it quite gud tho keep it up solja

N*O*U*R*
06-18-2006, 08:02 PM
basic, no rhyme schemes, and too many syllables in each line