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JChavez
01-10-2007, 06:44 PM
Infrared thread aimed at middle of foreheads
Blood bath, arms open with wings spread
Hot slugs melting mugs like molten drugs
2007 Hezbollah Revolutionist terrorizing like 9/11
Hell on earth, war in heaven
Heat in hand, Operation Quicksand
Battles breaking out in Baidoa, Kalaber
MiG warplanes shooting down Apache helicopters
Taliban Military Commander, Cali Pit-Bull Handler
Anatomy spreader, breaking femurs like Schwarzenegger
Mayhem Maniac, mania raps is the line of attack
Packed axe in my combat sack to hack shoulder straps
Solar panel beams sharper than scalpel candles
Severing spinal cords from spinal canals
Arizona thug rebel spitting flame metal
Johnny Mnemonic Marvel comics Iron Man terrorist
Arsenic lyrics, delusion monothematic, psychotic logic
Rebellious visions of disorder and anarchy
Wildcat from here to Kentucky like Walter McCarty
Born into vast plains of fire with horror being my legacy
Gutters embrace the slaughtered when my dagger utters
I’m like Iraqi law, death sentence carried out within 30 days
Hazed with craze is how I was wildly raised
Now I’m in the age of the perilous atomic rage
This violent sanctuary leads to the insane
Vile and genocidal lunatic shall only reign
I engrave searing mics to Holocaust grave sites
Spread hate like al-Qeada odium videotapes
Son of perdition on the wings of abomination
Atheistic passion breathes a wave of persecution
Detonation of bombs in succession at intersections
Vaginal animal, hyena devouring female emcees birth canals
Thunderbolt visual evolution after volcanic flow glows
I hem ion beams with Leatherface’s sewing machine
Electric current wire-tapping, master of disguise
Brian De Palma “Wise Guys” left with wide eyes
After getting throats cut with Columbian neck ties
Bullet stray ‘Raid’ like roach spray
On impact brains levitate from cranial frame like David Blaine
Battlecats with no shields get caps peeled
Eyes paralyzed, zombies screaming, souls cry
Minds blown with rhymes designed like land mines

noel411
01-10-2007, 08:48 PM
Not bad dude. I would say most aspects of that verse are on the positive side. Not a bad style you're using there. Kind of quick loosely linked thoughts. It seemed to flow pretty well. Good choice of words too. From what I recall you may have said previously that you are quite new to this? If that is the case then I can definately see you penning some tight shit a little further down the line.

JChavez
01-19-2007, 07:25 PM
Thanks for the feed. No disrespect duke - just been extremely busy. Yeah - I've been reppin' in this bloodsport for about 1/2 year. I started writing ruck in June of 2006. This lyrical novice is a quick learner. My objective, and what I'm striving for is to one day be able to hold my own against Wu Corp.'s tightest lyricists. It's an attainable goal, since I'm my harshest critic and am inspired by all that participate in this website. One can only be motivated by the ruckus that's written in here.