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Smoke E.
01-18-2007, 03:38 PM
Yo 16 bars, tell me wats up.ct was good.



ayo its yaboy smoke to da E
Choke on da trees I roll up dem Gs
I roll wit some Gs that aint hold no heat
But if yall wanna compete, get thrown in defeat
Yall stay in yo seat yall boyz are weak
Gain some muscle and come back in a week
I stay on my hustle got stacks of dat green
Sell all my dubs to the cats and da fiends
Im big Macing it seems how I stay wit da cheese
Da haze got me cream, no team I am solo
Rollin in da dough-lo, stay low around the po-po
Is my bankroll slow?no , da mo money I get da more hungry I get
Aint even funny, its sick, the way im pilin chips
Its the smile I get for every dime that I flip
Dat makes me keep pushin, and supplyin my shit
So when I die, im known for grindin, not just some guy in a ditch

Smoke E.
01-20-2007, 12:19 PM
yo feedback . ya herd

jallainINS
01-20-2007, 12:40 PM
that wasnt bad. the rhymes were solid but they were kind of simple. maybe try to add some multies and hit it with some rhyme schemes. as far as the subject matter ya know it really wasnt my thing. im not into writing about that kinda stuff. but you pulled it off, so yeah my only advice is try to make in unisyllabic and i think youve got potential.

could you drop some feed on my post too? thanks bro.