Come Honor Face
05-21-2007, 12:21 PM
Yo I live in Charleston West Virginia.Now Chucktown is pretty much citylife like Detroit or Chicago but on a smaller level.Now most of WV is country life 4 real.Which leads me 2 my story.I went to a bonfire party in Ripley WV(country)
It was the first time I had ever really hung out outside Chucktown or the surrounding burbs.Anyhow everything was goin pretty good (plenty of weed,alchohol,and PUSSY!) There was this one redneck fucker (u know chewing tobacco,dirty ass clothes,rotten teeth) he was doin nasty shit to impress people.U know like eatin worms and little shit like that. (thats how rednecks try 2 impress i guess) Then someone suggested he fuck a cow!
So everone offers $ 2 him 4 doin it.5 dollars here 10,15 dollars there.Finally the total offer was $470. He agreed.So he closes in on the poor unsuspecting cow but then realizes there is a problem.He is about 1 or 1 1/2 feet to short.
Well thats the end of that I thought.I was unfortunately mistaken.About a minute later he comes out of this old barn and shouts "sometimes u gotta impervise" (spelled improvise that way because that is how he said it. LOL
His shouted got my attention again and I realize he is carrying sumpin. Turns out it was a valley bell (dairy company) milk crate.And this dirty ass country bumpkin muthafucka stood on that milk crate and fucked that cow like a wildman! People went behind the cow (not me!) 2 insure he really was doin it.He was.So he finishes (gross) and runs down 2 the creek and washes his shit off.Comes back up smilin from ear 2 ear (showin all 3 of his teeth and says "now wheres that money yall"
Had to share that one! (yes its true)
It was the first time I had ever really hung out outside Chucktown or the surrounding burbs.Anyhow everything was goin pretty good (plenty of weed,alchohol,and PUSSY!) There was this one redneck fucker (u know chewing tobacco,dirty ass clothes,rotten teeth) he was doin nasty shit to impress people.U know like eatin worms and little shit like that. (thats how rednecks try 2 impress i guess) Then someone suggested he fuck a cow!
So everone offers $ 2 him 4 doin it.5 dollars here 10,15 dollars there.Finally the total offer was $470. He agreed.So he closes in on the poor unsuspecting cow but then realizes there is a problem.He is about 1 or 1 1/2 feet to short.
Well thats the end of that I thought.I was unfortunately mistaken.About a minute later he comes out of this old barn and shouts "sometimes u gotta impervise" (spelled improvise that way because that is how he said it. LOL
His shouted got my attention again and I realize he is carrying sumpin. Turns out it was a valley bell (dairy company) milk crate.And this dirty ass country bumpkin muthafucka stood on that milk crate and fucked that cow like a wildman! People went behind the cow (not me!) 2 insure he really was doin it.He was.So he finishes (gross) and runs down 2 the creek and washes his shit off.Comes back up smilin from ear 2 ear (showin all 3 of his teeth and says "now wheres that money yall"
Had to share that one! (yes its true)