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View Full Version : The motherfucking warning


Murderous Mack
08-04-2005, 02:16 AM
Engaged in the moment, the cage opens as I face my opponents,
step on stage, spit rhymes so potent that I leave the mic smoking,
it's rage you're provoking,
I was tame for a moment, but at this stage it's hopeless,
to maim is my focus,
enraged as I throw fists, and the same when I wrote this,
feel pain as your throat slits,
swarm foes like a pack of locusts,
your body lays motionless,
no escape opening, since I chained and I roped it,
pain you can't cope with,
tape rolling while you moan over broke ribs,
insane with no motive,
my hands hold the blade you were poked with,
stained with the remains of your life,
body lays with lacerations engraved by my knife,
inflamed and alive,
the memories ingrained with my pride,
my enemies my wife that stays by my side,
without their pain I couldn't survive,
no escape when desire and rage intertwine,
you've lived, now you die,
inspired by dire surroundings, and it's raining tonight,
hear your heart pounding with fright,
as my victim cowers, I allow a brief time of respite,
I'm like a snow plower, but it's lives I'm pushing aside,
so good with the knife,
that in a blink of the eye, I've removed all your insides,
blink and you die,
I won't think twice before concluding your life.

GuardianOne
08-04-2005, 09:39 AM
Your verse suits the title. And the rhymes were traditional, although i noticed within the middle of the verse you seemed to run out of what to rhyme with. But that paased- go flow.

Peace

Killer Falcon
08-04-2005, 10:01 AM
the verse was decent, but not flawless. lyricism was ok, but from reading the verse it is clear that you were probably focussing on your flow. the flow was nice, you had a lot of rhyming words but it was impossible to pick up any kind of rhythm since you dont really have any verse structure. no diss, i'm just trying to be constructive. keep it up

peace

Murderous Mack
08-04-2005, 04:36 PM
Yo, much love for the feed, family. You'll both be spared during Murderous Mack apocalypse.