PDA

View Full Version : A Tale of Two Whores


Huggasaurus Sex
02-28-2009, 07:07 AM
so friday morning i wake up on my living room sofa with my housemate standing over me wearing a suit and laughing. i turn over and there's a girl laying next to me who i've never seen before in my life and on the other end of the sofa is my other housemate also sleeping next to some girl who i don't immediately recognize. i'm still piss drunk from the night before.

so the one housemate just says good morning and leaves. i look at the girl next to me and she looked decent so i ask her if she wants to go to my room upstairs and she does.

then we fuck off and on all morning . i eventually learn some things about her like her name and at some point realize that she's the friend of some whore who me and my housemate met briefly at a club a few weeks ago.

anyway, this random girl who sleeps with total strangers -- nice girl. probably a whore. didn't bother getting her number. and no mention of money whatsoever. all in all, a great friday morning.

so then last night we make the usual rounds and come home empty handed but i felt like dropping some e just for the hell of it and my housemate gets the idea to invite a girl over to roll with us -- another whore.

(mind you, he has no intention of ever paying these whores for sex but they're all over the clubs and they're friendly and he winds up with their numbers... and they're always down for free e.)

so a little while later she shows up and she's with a friend and i literally can't tell you how many times we've done this... random girls show up at the house, we drop e, talk, listen to music, dance, and sometimes get slutty. but never ever pay them to do this.

her friend looks pretty good but not really my type and honestly i could give a fuck whether or not i hook up with her. but as the night goes on and the pills kick in we're eventually making out on the sofa and then she's got my dick in her hand so it was time to move the party upstairs.

i should've known when she asked me to shower beforehand that this wasn't the kind of serendipitous love making from the morning before but i just figured she was doing it out of routine.

then when she insisted i wear a condom that should've been the red flag that she was looking for money because only strict whores ask you to wear a condom in this city.

but anyway i missed all the signs and proceeded to bang her and she was a pretty boring fuck (another dead giveaway). not long after that my housemate takes off for work and i'm expecting them to leave too. go to give her money for the taxi but she won't take it. she just sits there calling to her friend.

her friend comes over and explains to me that i have to pay this bitch for receiving the schlong of the firm one.

i couldn't understand everything they were saying but i simply explained to them that i wasn't gonna pay. then shit starts to get out of control. my whore is on the phone to her pimp and saying my address. the other whore is screaming at me to open the door to let her out and i'm telling them both to get the fuck out but my whore is not gonna leave until i pay her.

had i realized sooner that this whole mess was my friend's whore's fault i never would've let her leave but she had a crazy look in her eye so i decided to let her leave and i go to the door and shit is already unlocked.

dumb bitch.

then i turn around and my whore's at the top of the stairs holding my laptop like she's gonna drop it. well ok she wins. so i sit her down and have her clearly explain to me what the fuck was going on. apparently the whore my friend was with (who he didn't fuck cuz she was kinda busted) called this girl and told her she'd be working that night so the whole time she thought she was there strictly to fuck and i had no idea.

so realizing i really had no choice but to pay her i take out a hundred dollar bill and she reaches for it but i hold onto it and tell her that i want her to say "i'm a dirty whore" before i give her the money and we stare each other down for a little while and she says she's not gonna say it so i asked her if it was true or wasn't true that she fucks people for money. by this point she's enraged so i stick the bill into her skirt and tell her to get the fuck out.

whores.

Uncle Steezo
02-28-2009, 08:48 AM
hahahaha SE asian whores think they slick.

I had this Thai Whore try to steal this Gucci link cause her dumb ass decided to play it cool and have fun 1st without collecting the money.

i figured she was free. i bought drinks and weed.
in the morning i only had 200 Baat on me ($8) and i sure as hell wasn't busting a Travelers Check.

http://i222.photobucket.com/albums/dd116/STYLEMASTERR/asia/thaiskyline.jpg
i guess thats a tactic. "have good time 1st and you can ask for more money later"???



Whores Indeed.

SHRAP
02-28-2009, 09:04 AM
where the fuck do u live that u go to the club and come back with prostitutes

Uncle Steezo
02-28-2009, 10:21 AM
he's in veitnam
he got a sweet job in the finacial sector but due to the global economic crisis, he's doing tranny surprise porn to make ends meet.

Ghost In The 'Lac
02-28-2009, 02:19 PM
good story firmeous.

i jetted thru vietnam once on a motorbike. had a big crash thoguh in hoi-an and got layed up for a week. vietnam hospitals are places to be avioded at all costs. the staff were nice though.

i didnt get any whores there though as it seemed way too seedy and overdone. everything about it put me off, and the women looked like walking std traps.

i was in Wuhan in china once though, on a night out with some american buddies, and we ended up smoking these e-pills (or something similiar) through and bong and some straws in some sort of fucking crazy neon brothel. i didnt even know you could smoke pills. anyway these hos set them up for you, crush the pill, and even light it for you. they try to get you as wasted as possible so you fuck them. we had about 8 pills and 8 pints that night but still had the will power not to fuck any of the LOL, which got the chinese pimp pretty p.o'd, I dont agree with paying for sex when you can get it for free.

it was nice however to have really fine-ass chinese hos surround you, pouring your beer and setting up your drugs, while you and the guys get high and chat shit.

EAGLE EYE
02-28-2009, 02:24 PM
i need to go there.

Uncle Steezo
02-28-2009, 02:25 PM
hahahashazhahahashashza!!!!!

Lacey was in a mongolian trap house smoking bleep bloops out tha bong. .

gaaaaawddamn....

Uncle Steezo
02-19-2010, 06:02 PM
.

Ghost In The 'Lac
02-19-2010, 06:18 PM
whats your point pops? thats exactly the same as what i jsut posted, why are you trying to make something out of something that is clearly just not there.

the reason it kills u is because I did cool shit while i was in China, and you didnt, this kills u. online.

11th Chamber
02-19-2010, 06:31 PM
hahahaha SE asian whores think they slick.

I had this Thai Whore try to steal this Gucci link cause her dumb ass decided to play it cool and have fun 1st without collecting the money.

i figured she was free. i bought drinks and weed.
in the morning i only had 200 Baat on me ($8) and i sure as hell wasn't busting a Travelers Check.

http://i222.photobucket.com/albums/dd116/STYLEMASTERR/asia/thaiskyline.jpg
i guess thats a tactic. "have good time 1st and you can ask for more money later"???



Whores Indeed.


http://www.langfieldentertainment.com/images/PHOTOGALLERY%202007/Level%20Chris%20Bosh-Aug%2021-07.jpg

Whats up with China tho? I been to Japan and it was amazing. Thinking of making an all Asia trip sometime in the future..

Ghost In The 'Lac
02-19-2010, 06:35 PM
^AHAHAhahaaa

most of china is 3rd world compared to japan. idk though, what u want to know? i travelled through a large part of it (independently, on public transport, not the faggish tour operator shit Gavin did). its all different depending on where u go.

Uncle Steezo
02-19-2010, 06:36 PM
if i was to recommend china, i would suggest going to old world china instead of new china.

Ghost In The 'Lac
02-19-2010, 06:37 PM
Gavin u dont know shit about china. where ur pics huh? i posted loads of my china pics. the only shit u ever posted was that grainy ass shit photo from tahiland

Uncle Steezo
02-19-2010, 06:37 PM
this lying thing really has lacey rattled.
idk why he is so upset its not like its the 1st time he was caught in a lie.

Ghost In The 'Lac
02-19-2010, 06:40 PM
so pathetic.

your lying about someone lying, online.

dont u have a kid to look after?

Ghost In The 'Lac
02-19-2010, 06:43 PM
Really though, what grown ass 38 year old man with a son , spends his time online lying about someone else lying. There must be so much anger inside that frail body of yours.

Do u not understand people will simply read and realise there was no lie, and that you should really just be feeding your son?


This is honestly verging on another breakdown for you. You have totally lost your mind cuz.

Prolifical ENG
02-19-2010, 06:45 PM
Huggah thats a good story in 2009 and kinda like Deuce Bigalow...you should have came out and demanded her to pay 15 instead of you 100.

On the other hand your thread in 2010 turned out into an argument to who had a better time when they visited China and whos lying about it..

Uncle Steezo
02-19-2010, 06:45 PM
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!
gosh you really ARE mad.

i woulda just laughed it off like "lol yeah you got me"
but your armpits are wet.
its okay my "nigga" everyone has lied sometime in our lives.

Ghost In The 'Lac
02-19-2010, 06:47 PM
Yeah, I see what ur trying to do. Its kinda sad in a really pathetic way. This really is a new level of desperation for you.

Is this really how you spend your life?

Ghost In The 'Lac
02-19-2010, 06:49 PM
On the other hand your thread in 2010 turned out into an argument to who had a better time when they visited China and whos lying about it..

Wait, what? Are you people that stupid?

You do realise he's fabricated the whole thing, dont you? I know its kind of hard to believe someone could be that sad. Theres not even a discussion to be had.

Robert
02-19-2010, 06:50 PM
Great story Huggah, to go with the arguement you somehow initiated.

I have never fucked a prostitute, but I fucked a girl here who was prepared to lick my arsehole (to my surprise and amusement) in a place with 90% humidity, after a night of heavy drinking.

I'd say that's pretty close.

Uncle Steezo
02-19-2010, 06:52 PM
damn u posting rapid fire on two threads.

if there was nothing to worry about, then you could have just left it as a fail on my part.

but your feverish responses tell me that i hit the nail on the head.

post ur teef.
let's see if you about lied having any.

Ghost In The 'Lac
02-19-2010, 06:57 PM
No, im using it to kill u and rubbing it in. And u cant stand it. U cant turn it around.

Your the guy who spent 20 minutes searching for this thread.

Only then to realise you had failed to read the original post and the whole epic ether u anticpated crumbled down before u had even got it going. It cant be easy.

And im not gonna let u o forget about it! You fell off son!!

Wu-Tang Forum Internet Poster
02-19-2010, 07:01 PM
I thought i was an ornery motherfucker for rawdogging american skanks my whole life, but huggah's vietnamese whore stories really put things in perspective

Uncle Steezo
02-19-2010, 07:03 PM
sounds like a good plan dude.

you should also have pro teach you how to use the search function. it takes all of 10 seconds to find something. if you need 20 mins to find a post then you are doing it wrong.

and brush yo teef

Ghost In The 'Lac
02-19-2010, 07:09 PM
LOL what a hiwarious fail.

You went to all that cute lil trouble in eager anticipation, but in all your hurriedness you forgot to actually read.

Its kind of a sign o the times for you Gavin, this whole episode.

You really have lost "it". What happened to you dewd?

I thought u used to be good at this?

TSA
02-19-2010, 07:15 PM
http://www.langfieldentertainment.com/images/PHOTOGALLERY%202007/Level%20Chris%20Bosh-Aug%2021-07.jpg

..
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHAHAHAahahAHAHH Aha!!

Huggasaurus Sex
02-19-2010, 07:38 PM
Huggah thats a good story in 2009 and kinda like Deuce Bigalow...you should have came out and demanded her to pay 15 instead of you 100.

yeah i lost whatever bargaining power i might've had when i turned around and saw her holding my laptop over the ledge.

i forgot to add an epilogue to the story about how that whore made off with my phone too:

http://www.satelservice.com/shop/images/nokia_8800.jpg

i had another phone i was using at the time so i didn't notice it right away but that phone she took was prob worth a few hundred bucks.


Great story Huggah, to go with the arguement you somehow initiated.

I have never fucked a prostitute, but I fucked a girl here who was prepared to lick my arsehole (to my surprise and amusement) in a place with 90% humidity, after a night of heavy drinking.

I'd say that's pretty close.

"prepared to lick"? that doesn't sound very adventurous

yonder
02-19-2010, 07:42 PM
wunded fox what are you doing? if you are 38 years old you should be embarassed.

how can fail so hard and still try to play it off like this? you just failed so hard at your own game (the internet) that you should take a break and think about what you are doing.

and please dont respond to this cuz i mean no harm! and you knoooow thizzz
just stating my opinion. this is what forums is made for. not to make friends. you know. embarassing.

Wu-Tang Forum Internet Poster
02-19-2010, 07:44 PM
whose secondary is yonder?

yonder
02-19-2010, 07:48 PM
none sir!

Mumm Ra
02-19-2010, 07:55 PM
i dunno but he's incredibly lame and probably looks like a bitch

Ghost In The 'Lac
02-19-2010, 07:57 PM
wunded fox what are you doing? if you are 38 years old you should be embarassed.

how can fail so hard and still try to play it off like this? you just failed so hard at your own game (the internet) that you should take a break and think about what you are doing.

and please dont respond to this cuz i mean no harm! and you knoooow thizzz
just stating my opinion. this is what forums is made for. not to make friends. you know. embarassing.

Hahaha I like this guy

o-UJGvE8vnQ

yonder
02-19-2010, 07:57 PM
could say the same thing about you. except that i dont even care how you look. why would i?

Ghost In The 'Lac
02-19-2010, 08:00 PM
Dont mind Mummy Ra, he's a fully paid up registered member of the Gavin stan club. Thats his job.

Lex Lugor
02-19-2010, 08:07 PM
yeah i lost whatever bargaining power i might've had when i turned around and saw her holding my laptop over the ledge.
you shoulda smacked the hoe so hard you confiscated the e outta her
have you not slapped a hoe befowr?

Mumm Ra
02-19-2010, 08:17 PM
Dont mind Mummy Ra, he's a fully paid up registered member of the Gavin stan club. Thats his job.
it pays better than sucking on effeminate washed up rappers cocks while trying to convince people you're black yet being a busted mouth eurofag paleface who tricks girls into not having sex with him
but hey we all gotta make an internet living somehow right?

TheBoarzHeadBoy
02-19-2010, 08:21 PM
Owned

"Ancient spirits of evil, transform this decayed form to Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living!".

Ghost In The 'Lac
02-19-2010, 08:26 PM
Wait, did u just try to argue that being a fan of an forum poster is less worse than being a stan of a talented musician? Wow.

And dont start with that wigger shit, your the most wannabee black NOI dude on the entire site, and thats saying something on a wu tang forum. I dont find being called a wigga insulting, because wtf lol, i dont get it.

But wanting to be down with the NOI? When your white? Licking Sunnys balls simply because hes in NOI? Dude, u take the biscuit no homo for white black power.

Uncle Steezo
02-19-2010, 08:34 PM
ahahahah
lacey is heated.

Ghost In The 'Lac
02-19-2010, 08:42 PM
No Gavin, that wont work.

All those father jokes finally got to you. You cracked, and went for the big ether, and it backfired, terribly.

Mumm Ra
02-19-2010, 10:07 PM
Wait, did u just try to argue that being a fan of an forum poster is less worse than being a stan of a talented musician? Wow.

And dont start with that wigger shit, your the most wannabee black NOI dude on the entire site, and thats saying something on a wu tang forum. I dont find being called a wigga insulting, because wtf lol, i dont get it.

But wanting to be down with the NOI? When your white? Licking Sunnys balls simply because hes in NOI? Dude, u take the biscuit no homo for white black power.
hahaha look at this shook faggot
making shit up cause you got nothing on me
I didn't mention anything about you being a wigger
but youve tried numerous times to claim you're black -
AND YOU KNOW THIS IS TRUE
and i could give a fuck about the noi lmao - where the fuck do get this stuff from??
You sound like tsa 'ethering' me by talking about my great personality
or sid 'ethering' me about wearing a blue shirt -
hahah don't even try kid - you fags got nothin against me
keep suckin bitch-voiced rappers dicks tho it's adorable

INF
02-19-2010, 10:17 PM
losing that phone is nothing to whine about.shit is a piece of junk. second , 100 bones is nothing for you to whine about seeing as that you work on tv over there.


I woulda seriously laid my hands on those bitches and had them out of my house waiting on their bitch ass pimp to show up if I was you.Serious.


I woulda fucked a bitch up quick for grabbing any of my money items (i.e. computer , flat screens , wallets , etc)



anyway , thats crazy and you got the illest story of the year so far.


keep on keepin on.1

BLACK BART SIMPSON
02-19-2010, 10:35 PM
losing that phone is nothing to whine about.shit is a piece of junk. Second , 100 bones is nothing for you to whine about seeing as that you work on tv over there.


I woulda seriously laid my hands on those bitches and had them out of my house waiting on their bitch ass pimp to show up if i was you.serious.


I woulda fucked a bitch up quick for grabbing any of my money items (i.e. Computer , flat screens , wallets , etc)



anyway , thats crazy and you got the illest story of the year so far.


Keep on keepin on.1

c/s ...story is still cool tho

zooruka
02-19-2010, 10:44 PM
huggies story sounds alot like the movie risky business.



peace be with you !

Uncle Steezo
02-19-2010, 10:51 PM
it was a good story.
from 2009.
since then they have reconciled and currently are expecting a healthy negro baby.

INF
02-19-2010, 11:08 PM
0SGX1sRKYP4

Huggasaurus Sex
02-20-2010, 06:55 AM
losing that phone is nothing to whine about.shit is a piece of junk. second , 100 bones is nothing for you to whine about seeing as that you work on tv over there.


I woulda seriously laid my hands on those bitches and had them out of my house waiting on their bitch ass pimp to show up if I was you.Serious.


I woulda fucked a bitch up quick for grabbing any of my money items (i.e. computer , flat screens , wallets , etc)



anyway , thats crazy and you got the illest story of the year so far.


keep on keepin on.1

i wasn't whining so much as just adding to this whore's exceptional depravity by jacking a phone worth a few hundred bucks and then demanding me pay her a hundo on top of that.

i don't regret the way i handled it. if i had beat the shit out of her and thrown her ass out on the street i would've created a lot of headaches for me and my roommates. for one, i would've had to worry about one of us getting jumped every time we left the house. hired hitmen are cheap and the police are corrupt and useless (another time, a friend of mine slept with some dude's gf and dude hired a couple of thugs to stake out my house for a few hours until we were able to defuse the situation). and even if all she did was make a bunch of noise outside my house that very well could've pissed off the neighbors enough to call the police and put an end to our weekly parties. so a hundred bucks and some swallowed pride wasn't really a big price to pay.

ZigZag
02-20-2010, 09:54 AM
this was more a corpse worthy topic...atleast huggah we wouldn't of started gay beefs after such a interesting rendevous.