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Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 03:34 PM
Ok so I went to lunch with this guy just casual. (And check I kept my blackberry in my bag and never got it out-looked him in the eye and talked). So anyways order the food I got some noodles and veggies in oil and asked if there were any peanuts in it to which I was told no. Lies! I am allergic to nuts, all nuts and I take 2 bites and go into Anaphylactic shock (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shock_%28circulatory%29) and have to stick myself with a needle so I don't die. Ha. And I didn't tell him I was allergic to nuts. How embarrassing!!!!!!!! He was looking at me like WTF! He's never gonna call me again.


Anyone else have bad date stories?

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-04-2010, 03:36 PM
are you allergic to my nuts?

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 03:38 PM
Ugh ok people I am allergic to peanuts, almonds..........anything like that. K?

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-04-2010, 03:44 PM
get your mind out of the gutter i was talking about cashews...i keep a bag of them on me at all times.

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 03:47 PM
Ha!!!!!!!!!! Ur a hot mess!

Do u have a worst date story? Can't just be me.

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-04-2010, 03:51 PM
hmmm nah cant say i have usually i dont take girls out like that...chill nd smoke a blunt mostly...if anything we go to the movies and its pretty normal...guess if i had to say one it was when i found out that the girl that had fucked and sucked everyone in my friends circle was like 13...no pedo

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 03:55 PM
hmmm nah cant say i have usually i dont take girls out like that...chill nd smoke a blunt mostly...if anything we go to the movies and its pretty normal...guess if i had to say one it was when i found out that the girl that had fucked and sucked everyone in my friends circle was like 13...no pedo


Well dang!!!!!!!!!!!!! 13!!!!!!!!!!!! Geez.

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-04-2010, 03:57 PM
yea i was like 15 at the time...its a real problem out here with bitches lying abt their age...two of my niggas had the cops at their house cuz they ran train on sum like 14 y/o who said she was like 16 or 17

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 03:59 PM
yea i was like 15 at the time...its a real problem out here with bitches lying abt their age...two of my niggas had the cops at their house cuz they ran train on sum like 14 y/o who said she was like 16 or 17


Where do u live?

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-04-2010, 04:00 PM
in CT in the 860 area like new london and groton and norwich

SID
05-04-2010, 04:03 PM
New London?

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 04:04 PM
in CT in the 860 area like new london and groton and norwich


Wow maybe guys should start asking for ID before they do anything. LOL

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-04-2010, 04:09 PM
New London?

yes its better then where you live....


sorry...you didn't deserve that.

SID
05-04-2010, 04:24 PM
O 'Rly?

http://i42.tinypic.com/34eueqh.jpg



http://i44.tinypic.com/smds77.jpg

Awww look at that cute lil boat setting off..

INF
05-04-2010, 04:29 PM
HA! omg thats a good one.I mean that sucks about going into shock but still ...jesus.


yeah Im sure I gotta a couple of stories hold up and let me jog the memory banks.Ill be back

Prolifical ENG
05-04-2010, 04:32 PM
Im prolific in turning bad dates around.

For example, there was one time this girl I was to date (I think third date) and her 2 friends wanted to go to some shitty ass karaoke bar. So it was the first time I met her friends' boyfriends and all that shit.

So then we are at a table of 6, sippin our beers, those other dudes trying to stay on their best behavior and being sociable in the girls' lame ass conversations.

There were these other 2 faggots at the bar that wouldnt get off the mics and singing these songs to the words on the screen. Thats when I proceeded to make the most out of the scenario and take the leather bounded book of all the karaoke tracks they can play.

As I got my request granted and was sure I still remembered the words so I didnt have to look at the screen, which was R. Kelly - Bump n Grind.

As the song started I took my date by the hand towards the front as I got the mic. By the end of the first verse I started slow grinding her with the mic in my hand. Before we knew it those other 2 couples and a bunch of other couples were near the open space slow grinding to that song.

After I engineered that magical moment, the date venue quickly got switched to phase 2 at a nightclub.

Thats the first and last time I ever went to a karaoke bar.

Uncle Steezo
05-04-2010, 04:35 PM
okay i got one or two...
one of my tactics is to pull over when i see a fine female walking, especially if i'm riding luxury. anyway... i was on the west side of chicago and i see this fine lil chick wearing dukes and a wifebeater. i pull over all smiles and charm ask if she needs a ride. she hops in and we spend the afternoon smokin and cruisin the city on a lovely summer day.


as the sun goes down i ask her if she wants to get a room, chill and get some drinks or whatever. she was eagerly with it. mind you, this was during a time when i was waist deep in drugs and i kept a medicine cabinet of narcotics on me at all times. lol

so i grab a bottle of henny and even tried to floss with a bottle of moet. lol
we go to the room and we drink and kiss a lil. we both real nice at this point and i decide, without warning, to lay out a fat line of coke on the dresser.

bad idea.

as i bend down to sniff it i feel a something poke me in my back.

nope not a dick...

a .22

the chick had pulled a pistol out her purse and had it pressed on me.
she said "niggas get crazy on that shit" and to "take her home...NOW!"

she caught me so off guard, i swear that shit had me in shock. it was almost surreal like "this isn't happening".

i tried to explain that i wasn't that dude and that i would flush the coke if it made her feel better. she wasn't having it.

so i grabbed all the bottles and weed, (gun still pointed) and we headed out the door where she finally put the gun away.

i couldn't do nothin but laugh when we were back in my truck.


she did call me a week later and apologize and wanted to go out again but i said hell no. i figured it was a set up.

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-04-2010, 04:42 PM
yea she prolly called her brothers and cousins up to rob you....why am i suddenly hearing abt alot of negros sniffin coke like its a cool thing to do

Art Vandelay
05-04-2010, 06:39 PM
i had a customer that was in her mid 40s that i knew pretty well. (not like that, though). well she was recently divorced and she was going out on her first date in years and it was with a guy 10 years younger than her. they went to a restaurant and it was really dark and she was having trouble reading the menu but she didn't want to look old and put on her reading glasses. so she was able to only make out one item so she ordered that. she got her food and took a bite and broke her tooth.

when she was telling me this, she was laughing because she was trying to not look old and her teeth were falling out of her head. haha

Olive Oil Goombah
05-04-2010, 06:47 PM
i hate girls that are overly loud with the conversation

Art Vandelay
05-04-2010, 07:05 PM
so i was at a bar one night and started talking to a black chick. we exchanged numbers. i met her out the next weekend at the same bar. the entire time we were there, she was talking on her phone. finally she hangs up and we talked for a minute and her phone rings again. i tried to butt in for a second and ask her something and she shushed me. whoever she was talking to, she didn't want them to know she was with me. haha. after a few more minutes, i just said, i got to go. and i got up and left. haha.

(p.s. the fact that i was out with a black chick is irrelevant. i just want to see what Twink2 has to say about a black girl being on her cell phone on a date.)

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 07:46 PM
HA! omg thats a good one.I mean that sucks about going into shock but still ...jesus.


yeah Im sure I gotta a couple of stories hold up and let me jog the memory banks.Ill be back

Horrible. I was so embarrassed. I kept apologizing. But he did text me and ask if I was ok so that was sweet.

netscape check two
05-04-2010, 07:47 PM
This isn't technically considered a date, but anyway.. I was at the hump and dump club a while back. The lights are pretty dim in there, like most clubs. Some girl wanted to dance with me. I could tell she wasn't the best looking one there, but I was my usual friendly self, and I danced with her anyway. So when it was getting close to closing, she asked if I wanted to meet up with her at the apartments where she lived and hang out for a little. I said ok, why not. She told me at the club that her friend's boyfriend would give me a ride home a little later.

I had went to the club with two of my friends, so they dropped me off at this chick's apt. So I go into the lobby thing in this apartment building and I'm talking to the girl for a little. I noticed that in normal lighting that she definitely looked worse than what I thought she did. Then she asked if I minded if I didn't get a ride home till the next morning. Shortly after, I hear a knock at the window and I go out and I see my friends there. I went outside and they told me they came back to save me from that girl. I guess this was pretty immature of myself, but I decided to leave with my friend's, and I didn't bother letting the girl know I was leaving. My friend's and me all ran to the car for some reason before the girl came out to wonder what was going on, and we got out of there.

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 07:50 PM
Pro u grabbed her by her hand and grinded on her? Oh my.

MAYOR QUIMBY
05-04-2010, 07:55 PM
The hottest girl i've ever gone on a date with was a big pothead. Everything was going great, we were making out, she liked me. Hours later she invites me to kick it at her girlfriend's house to smoke up with her very good looking friend. Knowing marijuana affects me strong i decided to go anyway because i'm a guy. Sure enough as soon as i take the first hit i start trippin balls, hallucinating, going nutty, getting seriously paranoid, etc...I uncontrollably started acting very immature and embarrassed them and myself. Never heard from her ever again.

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 08:04 PM
Holy hell Gavin. Geez.

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 08:07 PM
so i was at a bar one night and started talking to a black chick. we exchanged numbers. i met her out the next weekend at the same bar. the entire time we were there, she was talking on her phone. finally she hangs up and we talked for a minute and her phone rings again. i tried to butt in for a second and ask her something and she shushed me. whoever she was talking to, she didn't want them to know she was with me. haha. after a few more minutes, i just said, i got to go. and i got up and left. haha.

(p.s. the fact that i was out with a black chick is irrelevant. i just want to see what Twink2 has to say about a black girl being on her cell phone on a date.)
Art with a black girl. Wow.

check is gonna say all black girls look alike. On a date on they phone. Ha.

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 08:11 PM
The hottest girl i've ever gone on a date with was a big pothead. Everything was going great, we were making out, she liked me. Hours later she invites me to kick it at her girlfriend's house to smoke up with her very good looking friend. Knowing marijuana affects me strong i decided to go anyway because i'm a guy. Sure enough as soon as i take the first hit i start trippin balls, hallucinating, going nutty, getting seriously paranoid, etc...I uncontrollably started acting very immature and embarrassed them and myself. Never heard from her ever again.
LOL. What a mess.



@ check that was mean

Prolifical ENG
05-04-2010, 08:12 PM
Pro u grabbed her by her hand and grinded on her? Oh my.

You make it sound so sudden and forced when it was a combination of smooth maneuvers and mood setting.

Art Vandelay
05-04-2010, 08:12 PM
Art with a black girl. Wow.

check is gonna say all black girls look alike. On a date on they phone. Ha.

what? you don't think i can pull a black chick?

netscape check two
05-04-2010, 08:15 PM
The black girls I've dated and hung out with are usually pretty quick.

netscape check two
05-04-2010, 08:16 PM
Art,
I think she is surprised that you can pull any girl in general, except the BFD's.

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 08:17 PM
You make it sound so sudden and forced when it was a combination of smooth maneuvers and mood setting.

Smooth? Yeah k.

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 08:19 PM
The black girls I've dated and hung out with are usually pretty quick.

U date black girls? Now there's a head scratcher.

Of course u can pull a black girl Art. Ur the man.

Prolifical ENG
05-04-2010, 08:22 PM
Smooth? Yeah k.

keep on talking about your bad dates while I was congratulated as being the hero that night.

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 08:25 PM
keep on talking about your bad dates while I was congratulated as being the hero that night.

LOL. Tu Shay.

Did u get some?

netscape check two
05-04-2010, 08:28 PM
U date black girls? Now there's a head scratcher.

Of course u can pull a black girl Art. Ur the man.

Yeah, I've dated the whole gambit. Black, spanish, white, asian, etc. I haven't sealed the deal all the way on a few ethnicities though. I look forward to accomplishing that and receiving my award.

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 08:38 PM
Ha. I'd like to try another race too. Hmmmmm maybe I'll work on that this weekend. Ha.

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-04-2010, 09:47 PM
never fucked an asian girl they are usually either really ugly or really hot

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 09:53 PM
I think I need to see what other races have to offer. Black men ummmm well I'm still single Ha.

Uncle Steezo
05-04-2010, 10:11 PM
Yeah, I've dated the whole gambit. Black, spanish, white, asian, etc. I haven't sealed the deal all the way on a few ethnicities though. I look forward to accomplishing that and receiving my award.

you dated a cajun mutant man?
damn son.

(i think u meant "gamut")
i pride myself on my sexual conquests. i have had em all... minus eskimo, red dot indian(top of my list), dark skin arab, aboriginal, aussy white.

Art Vandelay
05-04-2010, 10:13 PM
i've always wanted to fuck a midget

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 10:14 PM
On a side note

The offer I put in was accepted. We r moving to Queens. Just excited. Sorry.


As u were...

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 10:16 PM
i've always wanted to fuck a midget

LOL

U a mess!

I'd like to get me a young guy. Like 18 in his sexual peak.

INF
05-04-2010, 10:19 PM
i've always wanted to fuck a midget

I used to know a homeboy back in the day in high school that had it bad for a midget that went to our school. He was always like "look man she got a FAT booty!!!" Id be like hell naw.lmao

We would always be chillin after school an shit posted up on dudes caddy and one day this lil chick walked by and dude spit game and pulled that shit and later that week hit it. I fell the fuck out cuz he never did say much after he hit it. He just hit it and that was it. never seen lil chick come by when we was coolin after school anymore either.

lmao



on the other subject of conquest or whatever , lol -


I got a lot of flavors on my list I havent tasted.

INF
05-04-2010, 10:21 PM
LOL

U a mess!

I'd like to get me a young guy. Like 18 in his sexual peak.


you lookin more for like a 20 or 21 yr old.thats our real strong peak right there.not even based off my peak.its just facts.I think I read it in mens health in the docs office once

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 10:22 PM
on the other subject of conquest or whatever , lol -


I got a lot of flavors on my list I havent tasted.

Milk chocolate?

INF
05-04-2010, 10:25 PM
Milk chocolate?


only foreplay shit. kissin , touching , gettin head


no puttin it in yet though.


Im fixing to get all kinds of shit for this IKNOWIT

Art Vandelay
05-04-2010, 10:26 PM
who am i kidding, i just hope i don't ever fuck another fat chick again

INF
05-04-2010, 10:28 PM
I been with a majority of white chicks ,Im not gonna front. The rest were hispanic and then this one bitch named Gracie Chang back in the day LIKE WAAAAY back.


I have had ALL KINDS of white girl though.Im sick of it.

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 10:28 PM
only foreplay shit. kissin , touching , gettin head


no puttin it in yet though.


Im fixing to get all kinds of shit for this IKNOWIT

Yeah u ain't get it.

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-04-2010, 10:29 PM
LOL

U a mess!

I'd like to get me a young guy. Like 18 in his sexual peak.

by the end of next year remind me and ill hit it wit the long dick steez 4realll mengg

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 10:31 PM
who am i kidding, i just hope i don't ever fuck another fat chick again

How was that?



@ Infinity really? Wow. That makes me go hmmmmm.

INF
05-04-2010, 10:38 PM
it is what it is.


maybe I got it and turned it into something else?

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 10:42 PM
by the end of next year remind me and ill hit it wit the long dick steez 4realll mengg


Wow. U a mess.

INF
05-04-2010, 10:48 PM
called QUEEN "mennnng"


HA!

Queen Of Poetry
05-04-2010, 10:52 PM
Yeah I ain't know what that was. Is that man?

INF
05-04-2010, 10:58 PM
yeah its "man"

"mayne"

knaaaa whuuuut im tallllckin bout shaaawwwty

hahahahaha lmao

Queen Of Poetry
05-05-2010, 06:19 AM
Ha. I met guys like that. Call girls man and b

praise the almitey W
05-05-2010, 01:48 PM
was the guy white or black the last thread i recall you started involved a white guy saving you from a deer so i just figured you liked white guys now more than black guys anyways im sorry you got nuts on your food .

Queen Of Poetry
05-05-2010, 02:16 PM
LOL

He was black. Never dated a white man. White men only save me from getting killed by deer, they don't date me.

Professor Poopsnagle
05-05-2010, 03:38 PM
Can I conclude from that post that you have a fat ass?


Chances of anyone reading this are very slim, so let me just incriminate myself...

I was sitting in the train next to a sexy young lady. She started talking to me nervously like she was really wanting me to talk back to her. Which I did. Well, one thing led to another and we got down to business at my place and I did my thing right. No rubber though.
The next morning she left all satisfied and happy of course, because I'm nice like that. Chea. Now this girl told me she's 19 right, so I started cleaning up and I find her ID card on my kitchen table. Almost like she left it there on purpose.
At first I thought maybe she left it so she would have a reason to come knocking on my door. Then I started reading the info from her ID and it says she was born in feb 1992, which would make her 18 right now. But this shit happened over two years ago. I fucked a 15 year old.
One week goes by and I haven't heard anything from her, I didn't have the guts to contact her myself because of the awkwardness of the whole ordeal. So another two weeks go by and finally she calls me. I hoped to avoid the whole age thing and hoped she would just come and pick up her ID.
She didn't even start about the damn ID, no instead she dropped the P bomb. Preggers! Pregnant. FUUUUUUUUUUUU. And here comes the best part of it, she wants to keep it! Which she did by the way. So yeah, I'm a father now. I barely had contact with her after this, mainly because I never forgave her. I still have her ID though.

Queen Of Poetry
05-05-2010, 03:43 PM
Can I conclude from that post that you have a fat ass?


Chances of anyone reading this are very slim, so let me just incriminate myself...

I was sitting in the train next to a sexy young lady. She started talking to me nervously like she was really wanting me to talk back to her. Which I did. Well, one thing led to another and we got down to business at my place and I did my thing right. No rubber though.
The next morning she left all satisfied and happy of course, because I'm nice like that. Chea. Now this girl told me she's 19 right, so I started cleaning up and I find her ID card on my kitchen table. Almost like she left it there on purpose.
At first I thought maybe she left it so she would have a reason to come knocking on my door. Then I started reading the info from her ID and it says she was born in feb 1992, which would make her 18 right now. But this shit happened over two years ago. I fucked a 15 year old.
One week goes by and I haven't heard anything from her, I didn't have the guts to contact her myself because of the awkwardness of the whole ordeal. So another two weeks go by and finally she calls me. I hoped to avoid the whole age thing and hoped she would just come and pick up her ID.
She didn't even start about the damn ID, no instead she dropped the P bomb. Preggers! Pregnant. FUUUUUUUUUUUU. And here comes the best part of it, she wants to keep it! Which she did by the way. So yeah, I'm a father now. I barely had contact with her after this, mainly because I never forgave her. I still have her ID though.


First my ass is aight. Ha.


Second........wait so after 2 weeks she says she's pregnant? Is that even possible that fast like that? That seems suspect.

But anywho........so u got a kid and don't see it at all?

Uncle Steezo
05-05-2010, 03:48 PM
damn son. you need to find yo seed and take care of that.
regardless of how it happened, you need to take responsibility of that life you created.

i mean, its you. by now the baby looks like you and all that. you'll love it.
but the main thing is that you don't want your flesh out there fucked up. then 18 years later is all bitter and mad at you & the world.

Queen Of Poetry
05-05-2010, 03:54 PM
damn son. you need to find yo seed and take care of that.
regardless of how it happened, you need to take responsibility of that life you created.

i mean, its you. by now the baby looks like you and all that. you'll love it.
but the main thing is that you don't want your flesh out there fucked up. then 18 years later is all bitter and mad at you & the world.


Truth. That ain't cool to have a lil u out there and not take care of it or see it. Regardless, every kid needs they daddy and mommy.

Being a parent is the best thing. Yeah they get on ur nerves having to hear he spit on me or she kicked me (just my house?) but then there is that moment where it is worth it. My daughter always says to me "no one loves u like I do" and I always say "no one ever will"......see it's those moments.

Professor Poopsnagle
05-05-2010, 03:57 PM
First my ass is aight. Ha.


Second........wait so after 2 weeks she says she's pregnant? Is that even possible that fast like that? That seems suspect.

But anywho........so u got a kid and don't see it at all?
Actually, I think two weeks is the time a girl knows she's pregnant. But if you read it again you could see I said 1 + 2 weeks = 3 weeks.
damn son. you need to find yo seed and take care of that.
regardless of how it happened, you need to take responsibility of that life you created.

i mean, its you. by now the baby looks like you and all that. you'll love it.
but the main thing is that you don't want your flesh out there fucked up. then 18 years later is all bitter and mad at you & the world.
I'm not on good terms with her and it's a total bitch move. I really don't feel connected to my kid, maybe because I only seen her 3 or 4 times. But when that time comes, I will probably take responsibility.

Queen Of Poetry
05-05-2010, 04:04 PM
Actually, I think two weeks is the time a girl knows she's pregnant. But if you read it again you could see I said 1 + 2 weeks = 3 weeks.



Oh my bad..........

beautifulrock
05-05-2010, 04:08 PM
Can I conclude from that post that you have a fat ass?


Chances of anyone reading this are very slim, so let me just incriminate myself...

I was sitting in the train next to a sexy young lady. She started talking to me nervously like she was really wanting me to talk back to her. Which I did. Well, one thing led to another and we got down to business at my place and I did my thing right. No rubber though.
The next morning she left all satisfied and happy of course, because I'm nice like that. Chea. Now this girl told me she's 19 right, so I started cleaning up and I find her ID card on my kitchen table. Almost like she left it there on purpose.
At first I thought maybe she left it so she would have a reason to come knocking on my door. Then I started reading the info from her ID and it says she was born in feb 1992, which would make her 18 right now. But this shit happened over two years ago. I fucked a 15 year old.
One week goes by and I haven't heard anything from her, I didn't have the guts to contact her myself because of the awkwardness of the whole ordeal. So another two weeks go by and finally she calls me. I hoped to avoid the whole age thing and hoped she would just come and pick up her ID.
She didn't even start about the damn ID, no instead she dropped the P bomb. Preggers! Pregnant. FUUUUUUUUUUUU. And here comes the best part of it, she wants to keep it! Which she did by the way. So yeah, I'm a father now. I barely had contact with her after this, mainly because I never forgave her. I still have her ID though.This story is neat and all, but not true. 15 year olds don't carry ID. No reason to.

netscape check two
05-05-2010, 04:08 PM
That tends to happen a lot where the broads lie about their age. He should have used protection, but it is a bitch move on her part, like he said. Maybe she will learn not to lie about her age now.

Longbongcilvaringz
05-05-2010, 04:10 PM
The hottest girl i've ever gone on a date with was a big pothead. Everything was going great, we were making out, she liked me. Hours later she invites me to kick it at her girlfriend's house to smoke up with her very good looking friend. Knowing marijuana affects me strong i decided to go anyway because i'm a guy. Sure enough as soon as i take the first hit i start trippin balls, hallucinating, going nutty, getting seriously paranoid, etc...I uncontrollably started acting very immature and embarrassed them and myself. Never heard from her ever again.

hahaha, les you kill me chief.

I used to know a homeboy back in the day in high school that had it bad for a midget that went to our school. He was always like "look man she got a FAT booty!!!" Id be like hell naw.lmao

We would always be chillin after school an shit posted up on dudes caddy and one day this lil chick walked by and dude spit game and pulled that shit and later that week hit it. I fell the fuck out cuz he never did say much after he hit it. He just hit it and that was it. never seen lil chick come by when we was coolin after school anymore either.

lmao


haha, wow.

Can I conclude from that post that you have a fat ass?


Chances of anyone reading this are very slim, so let me just incriminate myself...

I was sitting in the train next to a sexy young lady. She started talking to me nervously like she was really wanting me to talk back to her. Which I did. Well, one thing led to another and we got down to business at my place and I did my thing right. No rubber though.
The next morning she left all satisfied and happy of course, because I'm nice like that. Chea. Now this girl told me she's 19 right, so I started cleaning up and I find her ID card on my kitchen table. Almost like she left it there on purpose.
At first I thought maybe she left it so she would have a reason to come knocking on my door. Then I started reading the info from her ID and it says she was born in feb 1992, which would make her 18 right now. But this shit happened over two years ago. I fucked a 15 year old.
One week goes by and I haven't heard anything from her, I didn't have the guts to contact her myself because of the awkwardness of the whole ordeal. So another two weeks go by and finally she calls me. I hoped to avoid the whole age thing and hoped she would just come and pick up her ID.
She didn't even start about the damn ID, no instead she dropped the P bomb. Preggers! Pregnant. FUUUUUUUUUUUU. And here comes the best part of it, she wants to keep it! Which she did by the way. So yeah, I'm a father now. I barely had contact with her after this, mainly because I never forgave her. I still have her ID though.

That's fucking crazy.

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-05-2010, 04:11 PM
jasper is just saying this so he can get in the proud parents sub forum too jack off to pictures of ur kids....you sly nigger

Longbongcilvaringz
05-05-2010, 04:12 PM
and queen, you have you change your mentality, what kind of faggit is going to be scared away by a peanut allergy?

Why didn't you just tell him that you were allergic to peanuts and that's why you were shooting up during lunch?

Uncle Steezo
05-05-2010, 04:16 PM
and queen, you have you change your mentality, what kind of faggit is going to be scared away by a peanut allergy?

Why didn't you just tell him that you were allergic to peanuts and that's why you were shooting up during lunch?

hahaha i never thought about it from that angle. she was having severe smack withdrawl.

Queen Of Poetry
05-05-2010, 04:16 PM
and queen, you have you change your mentality, what kind of faggit is going to be scared away by a peanut allergy?

Why didn't you just tell him that you were allergic to peanuts and that's why you were shooting up during lunch?



I did tell him after and apologized over and over. Ha. He did call. I was just embarrassed. He said it freaked him out cause he ain't no what was going on or how to help me........but he did call.

Queen Of Poetry
05-05-2010, 04:18 PM
hahaha i never thought about it from that angle. she was having severe smack withdrawl.


That's just mean but funny!

Ha!

What a mess!!!!!!!!!!! Man thank goodness he ain't whip out his phone and start filming. Probably be on Youtube by now.

Longbongcilvaringz
05-05-2010, 04:21 PM
Why did you apologise?

You should be angry at the fuckers who told you there were no peanuts in the food.

Longbongcilvaringz
05-05-2010, 04:22 PM
hahaha i never thought about it from that angle. she was having severe smack withdrawl.

haha, struggling to breathe, clamming up and desperately trying to find a vein.

Professor Poopsnagle
05-05-2010, 04:24 PM
This story is neat and all, but not true. 15 year olds don't carry ID. No reason to.
Yeah ok, you got me. But it was a enjoyable story though, wasn't it?








































http://www.divshare.com/img/11279238-b8f

Queen Of Poetry
05-05-2010, 04:24 PM
Why did you apologise?

You should be angry at the fuckers who told you there were no peanuts in the food.



Oh I cursed them out. I don't know why. He said the same thing. No need to apologize and now he knows for the next time we go out (go Queen go Queen). Ha. He wants me...........kidding.

beautifulrock
05-05-2010, 04:31 PM
Yeah ok, you got me. But it was a enjoyable story though, wasn't it?








































http://www.divshare.com/img/11279238-b8f
I thought you were from north memphis. And the lies pile up. Don't turn into Afficial Nastee.

Longbongcilvaringz
05-05-2010, 04:31 PM
Yeah ok, you got me. But it was a enjoyable story though, wasn't it?

http://www.divshare.com/img/11279238-b8f

8O

Oh I cursed them out. I don't know why. He said the same thing. No need to apologize and now he knows for the next time we go out (go Queen go Queen). Ha. He wants me...........kidding.

:yes:

Professor Poopsnagle
05-05-2010, 04:39 PM
I thought you were from north memphis. And the lies pile up. Don't turn into Afficial Nastee.
Who?

Everyone knows I'm not from the states, that was my location when I had a picture of Juicy J as my avatar. Never really cared or thought about changing it. So yeah ok I lied, I'm not from Tennessee... jees, step off my dickpiece kid.

INF
05-05-2010, 04:45 PM
whoa! I just caught some of this right now. ... ..

I gotta come back and read this whole thread but Im going to go workout first (for QOP).


stay up J-mac

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-05-2010, 04:59 PM
lmao @ brock not knowing the god jasper...whaat a faggot...sly niggers

beautifulrock
05-05-2010, 05:08 PM
I just got called a faggot by a 12 year old who got kicked out of a text battler subforum, my life is over.

I know it's Jasper. And I also know he's full of shit.

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-05-2010, 05:13 PM
I just got called a faggot by a 12 year old who got kicked out of a text battler subforum, my life is over.

I know it's Jasper. And I also know he's full of shit.

^^ im getting called a 12 year old by some short pudgy virgin white guy who likes to take people on the internet to baseball games for free...and went on an emotional rant about how nobody wanted to work on his dumb ass idea in a text battler sub forum.....


arghhhhh touched

beautifulrock
05-05-2010, 05:16 PM
You are a 12 year old. Skampoe changes your diapers when he babysits you.

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-05-2010, 05:19 PM
lmao im 16 lmao u wear gym shorts with walmart work boots to pick up chicks...its like not a contest

beautifulrock
05-05-2010, 05:21 PM
I don't own workboots, I don't shop at Wallmart, and you're 12, cause I say so.

beautifulrock
05-05-2010, 05:22 PM
Who?

Everyone knows I'm not from the states, that was my location when I had a picture of Juicy J as my avatar. Never really cared or thought about changing it. So yeah ok I lied, I'm not from Tennessee... jees, step off my dickpiece kid.

You also lied about impregnating a 15 year old. ERverybody knows you only fuck hookers, jeez.

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-05-2010, 05:24 PM
I don't own workboots, I don't shop at Wallmart, and you're 12, cause I say so.

tough guy stories

beautifulrock
05-05-2010, 05:26 PM
Yea tough guy, you're still trying to figure out what the galloping dandruff is on your first pubic hair.

Professor Poopsnagle
05-05-2010, 05:28 PM
Well that's new to me. I don't give a fuck what you believe, I can back it up. Matter of fact, I already did. Man you seem bitter as fuck when I never even said anything to you. Like ever.

beautifulrock
05-05-2010, 05:35 PM
Showing a random ID isn't proof of anything other than your ability to use google images.

I have nothing against you personally, it's just everybody seems to like you, and that really irks me on an internet forum. Come up with a better story. It's easy to dupe retards like QOP, where's the fun in that? Her IQ is clearly under a hundo.

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-05-2010, 05:35 PM
Well that's new to me. I don't give a fuck what you believe, I can back it up. Matter of fact, I already did. Man you seem bitter as fuck when I never even said anything to you. Like ever.

brock has been at rock bottom for so long.

beautifulrock
05-05-2010, 05:36 PM
Isn't it close to your bed time?

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-05-2010, 05:38 PM
showing a random id isn't proof of anything other than your ability to use google images.

I have nothing against you personally, it's just everybody seems to like you, and that really irks me on an internet forum. Come up with a better story. It's easy to dupe retards like qop, where's the fun in that? Her iq is clearly under a hundo.

self ether it really irks him hhahahahhha

Teh KillaBee
05-05-2010, 05:39 PM
does a bad date involve GHB, chloroform, and, or unconscious sex?

Professor Poopsnagle
05-05-2010, 05:42 PM
Showing a random ID isn't proof of anything other than your ability to use google images.

I have nothing against you personally, it's just everybody seems to like you, and that really irks me on an internet forum. Come up with a better story. It's easy to dupe retards like QOP, where's the fun in that? Her IQ is clearly under a hundo.
No what I've proven is that I have an ID here of an 18 year old woman who is from the same small town as me. Do I need to fucking show a picture of me holding the card in my left hand and todays paper in my right?

You don't have much reason to not belief me, so don't just flat out call me a liar. No wonder no one likes you on a websites forum.

beautifulrock
05-05-2010, 05:44 PM
Yes, prove it that way. You hurt my feeling, Herbert.

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-05-2010, 05:48 PM
lmao @ brock

beautifulrock
05-05-2010, 05:51 PM
^^^Will somebody for god's sake give him a bottle and burp him, he's cranky.

Teh KillaBee
05-05-2010, 05:52 PM
Isn't it close to your bed time?

brock has been at rock bottom for so long.

Well that's new to me. I don't give a fuck what you believe, I can back it up. Matter of fact, I already did. Man you seem bitter as fuck when I never even said anything to you. Like ever.


http://img210.imageshack.us/img210/8666/fagwars.jpg

BLACK BART SIMPSON
05-05-2010, 05:56 PM
http://img210.imageshack.us/img210/8666/fagwars.jpg

oh great now this niggas here...please dont post..

beautifulrock
05-05-2010, 05:58 PM
There's something inside me that makes me wanna bash an infant with a spiked mallet every time somebody spells "the" intentionally wrong. Must be my aspergers acting up. Time for some colorful pills.

Teh KillaBee
05-05-2010, 06:07 PM
There's something inside me that makes me wanna bash an infant with a spiked mallet every time somebody spells "the" intentionally wrong. Must be my aspergers acting up. Time for some colorful pills.


cool story brah

INF
05-06-2010, 02:55 AM
Good thread here.hope it keeps going (minus the gay shit via killbot and b-rock)






I think I need to see what other races have to offer. Black men ummmm well I'm still single Ha.


seriously you should find a white dude to kick it with.A cool ass white dude.not some lame kinda white dude ...like them cats from Napoleon Dynamite orrrr say....B-rock.


Find you a smooth cat like PRo. A mf that is fixing to get the party started and shit.That was fly if you think about it.You know them Karaoke shits is NEVER jumpin.I got a friend that works that shit for like 10 yrs now.swear to god I quit fuckin with dude cuz he expects you to come out to this club and fuck around on karaoke night an shit.....mf please. there was like always the same hos there non stop it was retarded.after the first two yrs of randomly stopping by to see my boy host his karaoke show ...I was threw with that place.not even free drinks could help it.

so big up to PRo for doing it bigg up in the VIP of the Karaoke. Get you a cat like that Queen. He'll do it up big for you watch.you gon have fun.








damn son. you need to find yo seed and take care of that.
regardless of how it happened, you need to take responsibility of that life you created.

i mean, its you. by now the baby looks like you and all that. you'll love it.
but the main thing is that you don't want your flesh out there fucked up. then 18 years later is all bitter and mad at you & the world.




WISE WORDS BEING SPoKEN ^

Queen Of Poetry
05-06-2010, 04:09 PM
A white man with a big pee pee! That's a must!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cool is good but he gotta be packin. Ha!

INF
05-06-2010, 04:23 PM
lmao!

RzaRectum
05-06-2010, 05:36 PM
A white man with a big pee pee! That's a must!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cool is good but he gotta be packin. Ha!
Is there a size limit, or are you a glutton for punishment? :=)

INF
05-06-2010, 05:41 PM
5'2'' and a Buck oh something.......

with a big dick fetish ?????

Dear lord.


"she said ..Im not boning you with those too long shoesssss" - Kanye West





hahahaha I wear size 13.Im not saying that the myth is true but one time I had an extra pair of shoes at my job that I had gotten on my break and.... I was in the back doing some stuff and two of our female employees were out front talking about "whos shoes are these???"

well I was about to come around the corner and speak up about the shoes but right before I came around the corner I could hear one of them saying "oh these Sed's shoes ....girrrrlllllll YOu knowhe gotta BIG OL DIIIII...."


and then I came around the corner.Cheesin.

netscape check two
05-06-2010, 06:01 PM
Like has been said before, having a bunch of tattoos, frowning a lot, and having a long rap sheet is required also for Queen.

snapple
05-06-2010, 07:54 PM
^^check two's ex probably got smashed out by some thug and hes bitter about it LOL

i was very curious at one point in my life...ive tasted a lot of different flavors....i really don't have a preference....

it all comes down to the individual with me.... physical + mental must be on point.....otherwise its not happening

i could never understand those people who have a "type" or who only hook up with a certain "type" or wont hook up with a certain "type" could never really figure that one out...

and thats funny about the shoe thing....i can relate

Queen Of Poetry
05-06-2010, 08:03 PM
5'2'' and a Buck oh something.......

with a big dick fetish ?????


.


U know what they say about tiny girls.....

No I don't have a size requirement. I just when presented with it if I like it. Ha.

PALEHORSE
05-06-2010, 08:05 PM
i had a girl poop green on my nuts when i tried to stimulate her colon

RzaRectum
05-06-2010, 08:08 PM
i had a girl poop green on my nuts when i tried to stimulate her colon
You have such a way with women!

Queen Of Poetry
05-06-2010, 08:37 PM
i had a girl poop green on my nuts when i tried to stimulate her colon


Eeww

Queen Of Poetry
05-06-2010, 08:53 PM
U know what I hate..............the first date awkwardness. I think all first dates r the worst. I never know how to dress, wear my hair........what do I say? It's so annoying!

netscape check two
05-06-2010, 08:56 PM
^^check two's ex probably got smashed out by some thug and hes bitter about it LOL

i was very curious at one point in my life...ive tasted a lot of different flavors....i really don't have a preference....

it all comes down to the individual with me.... physical + mental must be on point.....otherwise its not happening

i could never understand those people who have a "type" or who only hook up with a certain "type" or wont hook up with a certain "type" could never really figure that one out...

and thats funny about the shoe thing....i can relate

No, it's an ongoing joke between her and me. Pipsqueak.

RzaRectum
05-07-2010, 01:20 AM
U know what I hate..............the first date awkwardness. I think all first dates r the worst. I never know how to dress, wear my hair........what do I say? It's so annoying!
Be yourself. That's how you got the first date isn't it :?

Frank Drebin
05-07-2010, 01:40 AM
nothing bad really except went on a date with a girl that I knew for a while, went to beach mucked around got some food talked did whatever. Bumped into my cousin talked and there was an awkwardness there. He leaves get a txt from him like 2mins later saying he fucked that girl in town a month ago so I had to bounce.

Uncle Steezo
05-07-2010, 01:59 AM
U know what I hate..............the first date awkwardness. I think all first dates r the worst. I never know how to dress, wear my hair........what do I say? It's so annoying!
look into his eyes and smile a lot maybe touch him on the arm or hand a few times when you do decide to say something.. thats all you gotta do. if he's worth a damn he should be able pick up the body language.


i love 1st dates. i charm and entertain all night. i try to show all of my best qualities like a demo or something.
my goal might not be to fuck her on the 1st date, but it IS to make her want to fuck me on the 1st date.

Longbongcilvaringz
05-07-2010, 02:42 AM
i had a girl poop green on my nuts when i tried to stimulate her colon

You have such a way with women!

hahaha

zooruka
05-07-2010, 02:53 AM
http://img210.imageshack.us/img210/8666/fagwars.jpg



hahahahahahahah


ilove`s story is truly unlucky...before i became religious... what happend to him could have easily happend to me on numerous occasions, because when I started to have sex I never use to dom up at all, because they said they was on the pill, but who knows girls lie big time..and I slept with like four different girls some multiple times and thank God !!!!!!! none of them got pregnant....even to this day I am greatful for this...and especially because this one girl I was having sex with on a regular basis ,after I stop seeing her, she became pregnant to this dude who was with her only a 5 months after me...and no its not mine, I did wondered this but the due date was way past the last time I was with her.


peace be with you !

Art Vandelay
05-07-2010, 03:05 AM
i knew of this guy named joe. he started seeing this chick named mary. she claimed she was a virgin. he kept trying to hit it, but she wouldn't let him. she was saving it. then a few months later, he found out she was pregnant, but she was still a virgin.

Uncle Steezo
05-07-2010, 04:03 AM
i knew of this guy named joe. he started seeing this chick named mary. she claimed she was a virgin. he kept trying to hit it, but she wouldn't let him. she was saving it. then a few months later, he found out she was pregnant, but she was still a virgin.
he fell for that shit too... didn't he?

RzaRectum
05-07-2010, 04:33 AM
he fell for that shit too... didn't he?
No dude, he's taking a stab at Prof Zooruka. Joe is Joseph and Mary, the virgin mother to Jesus. (Don't know if you already saw this or not).

beautifulrock
05-07-2010, 04:49 AM
Anybody who believes Jasper's story is a complete idiot.

EAGLE EYE
05-07-2010, 04:54 AM
I've come to the conclusion none of you can handle a big salad OR a relationship.

zooruka
05-07-2010, 05:50 AM
Anybody who believes Jasper's story is a complete idiot.


If by jasper you mean ilove...Then I have to say dude seemed pretty convincing....especially with the i.d !!!!!!


:looking:

peace be with you !

Queen Of Poetry
05-07-2010, 08:02 AM
Be yourself. That's how you got the first date isn't it :?


Ha. Truth but it's still awkward.

Queen Of Poetry
05-07-2010, 08:04 AM
nothing bad really except went on a date with a girl that I knew for a while, went to beach mucked around got some food talked did whatever. Bumped into my cousin talked and there was an awkwardness there. He leaves get a txt from him like 2mins later saying he fucked that girl in town a month ago so I had to bounce.


Ouch:ouch:

Frank Drebin
05-07-2010, 08:11 AM
Ouch:ouch:


better on the first date than like 6months in

Queen Of Poetry
05-07-2010, 08:13 AM
That's true but still. That's gotta be some news to get. Ha.

Did she seem all weird when he came up to u?

Frank Drebin
05-07-2010, 08:17 AM
That's true but still. That's gotta be some news to get. Ha.

Did she seem all weird when he came up to u?

mmm actually she was ok he was acting weird like he needed to go I would had no idea if he didn't txt me that. I thought maybe he late for something or gotta take a shit lol something like that.

Queen Of Poetry
05-07-2010, 08:20 AM
LOL

So she was easy breezy. Wow.

Frank Drebin
05-07-2010, 08:22 AM
LOL

So she was easy breezy. Wow.

yeah very easy by the sounds of it :( but i think it's karma biting me in the ass anyways

Queen Of Poetry
05-07-2010, 08:29 AM
yeah very easy by the sounds of it :( but i think it's karma biting me in the ass anyways


Please we all got bad karma (trust I know).

I think it was just a coincidence. I mean the timing was like woah but I wouldn't say it's karma.

Mai Wang Tu Phat
05-07-2010, 08:33 AM
It turned out to be a dude.


lol naw, I haven't really had any bad ones, I've had ones that didn't really go anywhere, but no bad storries.

Queen Of Poetry
05-07-2010, 11:25 AM
LOL

Mines never go far. I usually fire the nigga real quick cause he's a moron.

Uncle Steezo
05-07-2010, 12:46 PM
No dude, he's taking a stab at Prof Zooruka. Joe is Joseph and Mary, the virgin mother to Jesus. (Don't know if you already saw this or not).
yes dude, i got capstone vision dun dun. i see it all.
my point was that mary played joe like a sucker.
lollipop licked ya dig?

Queen Of Poetry
05-07-2010, 01:13 PM
I just thought of another bad date I had (only b/c I just ran into the guy). I got set up on a blind date so all I saw was his picture. So I meet him and he has...............a high butt. I can't stand a man with a high butt! So the whole time he is talking, all I am thinking is how high is butt is.

INF
05-07-2010, 01:56 PM
I just thought of another bad date I had (only b/c I just ran into the guy). I got set up on a blind date so all I saw was his picture. So I meet him and he has...............a high butt. I can't stand a man with a high butt! So the whole time he is talking, all I am thinking is how high is butt is.


AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH high yella


:nonono:



that shit is funny like short arms

RzaRectum
05-07-2010, 03:08 PM
High butt, small shoes, sex addictions, drug abuse, pedophile... The list of flaws in people could go on and ON.

RzaRectum
05-07-2010, 03:27 PM
Here's a big one.. :lmao:


4pXfHLUlZf4

Queen Of Poetry
05-07-2010, 03:27 PM
High butt, small shoes, sex addictions, drug abuse, pedophile... The list of flaws in people could go on and ON.


LOL

I have a list/criteria that a man must meet in order to date me............that's why I'm still single. Ha.

INF
05-07-2010, 03:55 PM
post dat list

hahahaha

Queen Of Poetry
05-07-2010, 04:13 PM
post dat list

hahahaha


LOL

Can't smoke
He can drink but occasional
Can't eat pork
He has to be adventurous
He has to like kids
He has to have a big dick
He has to be cute
He has to be funny
He has to have a job
He can't have a high butt (ha)
He can't be the jealous type
He has to workout (at least a lil)
He has to sensative and charming and romantic

RzaRectum
05-07-2010, 04:17 PM
So, what if he had a HUGE dick, but had ZERO sex drive..

Queen Of Poetry
05-07-2010, 04:18 PM
So, what if he had a HUGE dick, but had ZERO sex drive..


A man with no sex drive? Do they make that model?

RzaRectum
05-07-2010, 04:54 PM
Ever see those ads in magazines for sexual dysfunction? I think those models are out there unfortunately... Thank gawd I'm NOT there.. as Dave Chapel says "that's mo (monkey) pussy fo me"

JE28vE25wVw

Frank Drebin
05-07-2010, 04:58 PM
LOL

Can't smoke
He can drink but occasional
Can't eat pork
He has to be adventurous
He has to like kids
He has to have a big dick
He has to be cute
He has to be funny
He has to have a job
He can't have a high butt (ha)
He can't be the jealous type
He has to workout (at least a lil)
He has to sensative and charming and romantic

what if he has a real long skinny dick or a short fat dick?

Queen Of Poetry
05-07-2010, 05:19 PM
I think those ads r for erections. I could be wrong. The desire is there but equipment don't work.




I prefer length and girth. LOL





My girl just called me and said she met this guy for lunch and all he did was look at her boobies. Ha. Bad date. Look at her eyes a few times nigga. What a mess.

INF
05-07-2010, 05:26 PM
yeah regardless the situation I always speak into the eyes and I expect the same.IF somebody doesnt talk to me and keep some eye contact then I dont really have too much respect for them.


Fine Broads is fine Broads but cmon now.you gotta act right.lol

Teh KillaBee
05-07-2010, 05:27 PM
LOL

Can't smoke
He can drink but occasional
Can't eat pork
He has to be adventurous
He has to like kids
He has to have a big dick
He has to be cute
He has to be funny
He has to have a job
He can't have a high butt (ha)
He can't be the jealous type
He has to workout (at least a lil)
He has to sensative and charming and romantic


you're gonna be single for a long time IMO, unless you can convince a homo to switch teams?

Teh KillaBee
05-07-2010, 05:30 PM
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH high yella


:nonono:



that shit is funny like short arms


and un-proportional torso's. I call 'em 60/40's - 60% up top and 40% below

RzaRectum
05-07-2010, 05:32 PM
you're gonna be single for a long time IMO, unless you can convince a homo to switch teams?
Not if she finds a muslim metro-sexual body-building comedian.

Longbongcilvaringz
05-07-2010, 05:37 PM
Anybody who believes Jasper's story is a complete idiot.

Hm, i don't know why you would say that.

I mean sure, he could be lying, but i don't see why you'd be particularly suspicious about his story.

And no, he hasn't presented infallible empirical evidence to support his story, but that doesn't mean it is automatically false.

It seems a bit far fetched, but not beyond the realms of reason, shit like that happens all the time.

If it was someone else who posted that would you believe them?

Is it because Jasper posted it, or because the story is too unbelievable?

Living-jism
05-07-2010, 05:44 PM
LOL

I have a list/criteria that a man must meet in order to date me............that's why I'm still single. Ha.
woooo, your like that shawty on "Tough Love"!

Queen Of Poetry
05-07-2010, 05:51 PM
Yeah I'm gonna be single forever. Tired if bending on my list and getting assholes.

RzaRectum
05-07-2010, 05:54 PM
Bottom line is.. If you want a man of a certain calibur, you need to have something to present that this sort of fellow is looking for. You may not meet up to their standards initially, but if you're not too far off.. Just make some adjustments and you'll increase your chances.

beautifulrock
05-07-2010, 05:55 PM
Hm, i don't know why you would say that.

I mean sure, he could be lying, but i don't see why you'd be particularly suspicious about his story.

And no, he hasn't presented infallible empirical evidence to support his story, but that doesn't mean it is automatically false.

It seems a bit far fetched, but not beyond the realms of reason, shit like that happens all the time.

If it was someone else who posted that would you believe them?

Is it because Jasper posted it, or because the story is too unbelievable?
Ummm let's see here. It's Jasper that posted it, the same person who took the pedophilia shtick to new levels, and if it was true why would he post it on the internet? Wouldn't that make him up for prosecution? Yea. Sure it's real. A real Springer moment. Idiots.

Teh KillaBee
05-07-2010, 05:56 PM
Not if she finds a muslim metro-sexual body-building comedian.


I've found him, his name is Benny Lava


sdyC1BrQd6g

Queen Of Poetry
05-07-2010, 05:56 PM
I have alot to offer. I'm a catch. LOL



But seriously I do curve on my list. I mean no ones perfect.

Frank Drebin
05-07-2010, 06:06 PM
I have alot to offer. I'm a catch. LOL



But seriously I do curve on my list. I mean no ones perfect.

im just curious as to how old u r if thats not being rude

RzaRectum
05-07-2010, 06:13 PM
I've found him, his name is Benny Lava


sdyC1BrQd6g


LMAO. ahahahah


There you go.. He'll put papaya there! You'll love him inside there!

Queen Of Poetry
05-07-2010, 06:19 PM
Lol

Longbongcilvaringz
05-07-2010, 06:21 PM
That's just character assassination brock, and very mean spirited of you bro.

Olive Oil Goombah
05-07-2010, 06:26 PM
thats a right on

beautifulrock
05-07-2010, 06:42 PM
Sorry if I'm being obtuse
http://www.scene-stealers.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/shawshank38.jpeg

Professor Poopsnagle
05-07-2010, 07:20 PM
Ummm let's see here. It's Jasper that posted it, the same person who took the pedophilia shtick to new levels, and if it was true why would he post it on the internet? Wouldn't that make him up for prosecution? Yea. Sure it's real. A real Springer moment. Idiots.
Wow, you're still going on about this?

Where I live, it's a bit different when it comes to having sex with minors. Yeah it's illegal what I did, but the age of consent here is 16. When it happened she was about two months from turning 16 and she lied about her age to me and I'm only prosecuted if she would press charges. And if it came to a court case, nothing would happen because the sex was consensual, she lied about her age, and no one ever gotten time for something like this.

If I were American I would probably have fled the country upon finding her ID.

beautifulrock
05-07-2010, 08:37 PM
cool story, bruh

INF
05-07-2010, 08:38 PM
koopa!


hpzEo6yeGtQhttp://download.lavadomefive.com/members/BigClawz/Artwork-Teaselbone-KoopaFeet.jpg

netscape check two
05-08-2010, 12:38 AM
I think those ads r for erections. I could be wrong. The desire is there but equipment don't work.




I prefer length and girth. LOL





My girl just called me and said she met this guy for lunch and all he did was look at her boobies. Ha. Bad date. Look at her eyes a few times nigga. What a mess.

Did your friend have like a low cut shirt on or something? I'm not saying the dude should have been staring.. but if a girl dresses a certain way, it's usually to get guys attention, so a glance every once in a while is normal. lol

Queen Of Poetry
05-08-2010, 08:15 AM
No but it was a fitted shirt. I mean I don't mind looking at my boobies, but dang look up every so often. She said everytime she looked at him he was looking at her boobies and it made her uncomfortable.

ShaDynasty
01-18-2012, 06:59 PM
went on 2 dates with a czech hoe a few years back. on the second date she ran up a huge drink bill, she was fucked out of her face and since i didn't really want a relationship i decided the c note she spent on 2 bottles of wine was not worth it to fuck her. i asked if she would pay, she refused and said she was feeling horny. i left the restaurant.

about 2 weeks later i'm riding the train and i see her cousins 2 guys that are criminals, basically heavies for some drug dealer. they spot me and chase me out of the train. anyway i kept seeing them around and having to run like usein bolt for about 6 months after. if i see them again i know they'll still recognize me cos they chased me 4 or 5 times. kinda wish i would have paid for her.

tekunique
01-18-2012, 07:29 PM
went on 2 dates with a czech hoe a few years back. on the second date she ran up a huge drink bill, she was fucked out of her face and since i didn't really want a relationship i decided the c note she spent on 2 bottles of wine was not worth it to fuck her. i asked if she would pay, she refused and said she was feeling horny. i left the restaurant.

about 2 weeks later i'm riding the train and i see her cousins 2 guys that are criminals, basically heavies for some drug dealer. they spot me and chase me out of the train. anyway i kept seeing them around and having to run like usein bolt for about 6 months after. if i see them again i know they'll still recognize me cos they chased me 4 or 5 times. kinda wish i would have paid for her.
LOL ! damn son... czech chics are hot...

netscape check two
01-18-2012, 07:37 PM
went on 2 dates with a czech hoe a few years back. on the second date she ran up a huge drink bill, she was fucked out of her face and since i didn't really want a relationship i decided the c note she spent on 2 bottles of wine was not worth it to fuck her. i asked if she would pay, she refused and said she was feeling horny. i left the restaurant.

about 2 weeks later i'm riding the train and i see her cousins 2 guys that are criminals, basically heavies for some drug dealer. they spot me and chase me out of the train. anyway i kept seeing them around and having to run like usein bolt for about 6 months after. if i see them again i know they'll still recognize me cos they chased me 4 or 5 times. kinda wish i would have paid for her.

Sounds like you might need some help from Linderman, son

http://awesomebmovies.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/my-bodyguard-scene.jpg

ShaDynasty
01-18-2012, 07:38 PM
yeah she was good looking but kinda skanky at the same time. she had nose rings and dyed red hair, which i usually wouldn't go for but as i say she was a bit of a hoe.

CEITEDMOFO
01-18-2012, 07:38 PM
REMEMBER WHEN QUEER GIMMICKS LIKE QUEER OF POETRY USED TO POST TIL I EXPOSED THEM OF THERE GAYNESS FORCING THEM TO EARLY RETIREMEnT

ShaDynasty
01-18-2012, 07:39 PM
Sounds like you might need some help from Linderman, son

http://awesomebmovies.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/my-bodyguard-scene.jpg

lmao yeah, but those guys would fuck him up

RzaRectum
01-19-2012, 01:58 AM
went on 2 dates with a czech hoe a few years back. on the second date she ran up a huge drink bill, she was fucked out of her face and since i didn't really want a relationship i decided the c note she spent on 2 bottles of wine was not worth it to fuck her. i asked if she would pay, she refused and said she was feeling horny. i left the restaurant.

about 2 weeks later i'm riding the train and i see her cousins 2 guys that are criminals, basically heavies for some drug dealer. they spot me and chase me out of the train. anyway i kept seeing them around and having to run like usein bolt for about 6 months after. if i see them again i know they'll still recognize me cos they chased me 4 or 5 times. kinda wish i would have paid for her.

Hind sight is 20/20 bruh. You didn't hit that ass and now you're worried about yours.. Do the knowledge. :list:

BrooklynKing
01-19-2012, 06:21 AM
Awesome story dude. I was once with a girl in a club and we stumbled into a seating bit and in there was the dad of my girlfriend (not the girl I was with) getting with some other young girl. The next time I went round to my girlfriends was strange...

Art Vandelay
01-19-2012, 12:24 PM
REMEMBER WHEN QUEER GIMMICKS LIKE QUEER OF POETRY USED TO POST TIL I EXPOSED THEM OF THERE GAYNESS FORCING THEM TO EARLY RETIREMEnT

way to chase the girls off, faggot

netscape check two
01-19-2012, 02:04 PM
^
She still posts here by the way

RADIOACTIVE MAN
01-19-2012, 02:12 PM
A while back..met this chick,native..real bad ass looking piece of ass man...got her digits and her started talking for a bit on the phone then one day she invited me to her house.....dude....I nearly puked in her face...even a pig sty was better than her spot..I can't even explain it....I've never been more mortified in my life