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Thread: Choose your own Wu-Tang Corp adventure

  1. #226


    You have selected Play as Jigsaw.

    Are you sure?


    Last edited by beautifulcock; 02-17-2013 at 05:21 PM.

  2. #227


    You chose a Defective Trip. This will definitely take you the long way.

    The video has a profound effect on your psyche. Suddenly you are stumbling and reliving the video as if in real time.
    You smash into Skampoe, or more like bounce off him as if he were a giant yoga ball, and stumble out the door into the street.
    The warm air hits your face and you begin to calm down, as familiar sites like the illegal dumping of trash, and outdoor public abortions greet your view.
    Ahhhh this is home. Bridgeport Connecticut. Home to malevolent scum, and such famous celebrities as nobody.
    Your head turns af if on a swivel as shots ring out. Where did they come from? You are far too high too tell.

    Do you

    Head EAST past the ten roadside memorials for fallen scum.
    Head WEST over the railroad tracks, past the shanty town and Dunkin' Donuts.
    Go back in the house and ask Skampoe what's up.
    Last edited by beautifulcock; 02-17-2013 at 07:09 AM.

  3. #228

  4. #229


    Whoooa, that feels better. Shit was starting to get too real.
    In your haze, you realize you have this awesome job with unlimited funds, so you can basically do anything on Earth you want.

    So what you wanna do with all this dough? Where do you want to go?

    There's no place like home. Bridgeport Connecticut
    Time to chill wit some Colombian niggaz.
    Spik in Space.
    Last edited by beautifulcock; 02-17-2013 at 04:23 PM.

  5. #230

  6. #231

  7. #232


    You bust right in and fall flat on your face. Skampoe busts out laughing.
    You are not amused.
    You try to get up, and the gun slips out of your ass crack, hitting the floor, and popping off a single shot that accidentally offs your competition.
    Skampoe is enraged. "Yo, What the fuck??!? You're lucky this shit is soundproof and nobody saw that.
    Help me get him in the instrument closet, and we'll come back after midnight and grab his body."
    You're still all fired up, so it isn't until after Skampoe screams at you and expains shit over again that you finally move to help him.
    While struggling to move his heavy lifeless corpse, you smile at Skampoe and say, "Lucky it wasn't you I shot," and you both share a hearty laugh.
    After stuffing your replacement in the closet, you walk out as conspicuously as possible, covered in smears of crimson stains.
    Everybody is looking at you like you're guilty as shit.
    When you walk out the entrance you say "phew, nobody suspected anything."
    Skampoe down turned his perfectly plucked eyebrows like a scornful parent.
    "Stupid Mutherfuckah, let's bounce, we gotta jump state."

    Suddenly you realize he is right, as sirens can be heard in the distance.

    Do you

    Run with Skampoe to the nearest car
    Gotta ditch him, I'll never blend in with his ass.
    Last edited by beautifulcock; 02-17-2013 at 04:23 PM.

  8. #233

  9. #234


    You light up a honey dip. "Fuck Skampoe", you say to yourself.
    "I don't need that muhfuckuh."
    You are clearly delusional now.
    Months of avoiding your better half have turned you into a serious loser junky.
    I mean nobody wants to go near you.
    Not even prostitutes.
    Ugly ones.
    You can't find success, because you can't even write a rhyme.
    As it turns out, Skampoe was doing it for you the whole time you were in PCP.
    You just never noticed until now.
    Suddenly, you start to feel a sense of loss.
    It's about time you saw Skampoe again.

    Wait, let me clean my gun first.
    Go find the big guy.
    Don't sell yourself short, you can still do this on your own. Try to think of your own original rhyme.
    Last edited by beautifulcock; 02-17-2013 at 04:34 PM.

  10. #235

  11. #236

  12. #237


    "Yo, your shoe be untied," you say, and as Skampoe looks down, you bust a cap in his knee. He falls to the ground and wails like a buffalo in heat.
    "Sorry bruh, but I gots to get me, dawg." You run to the car, as Skampoe swears his revenge behind you.

    You have a decision to make.

    He can't be allowed to tell the cops nuthing, run his fat ass over.
    Run him over? You're kidding right? Pop one in his head while I'm exiting the parking lot.
    He can't hurt me, let him say whatever he wants. I have to go now.
    Last edited by beautifulcock; 02-17-2013 at 04:34 PM.

  13. #238


    You jump out of the car and unload the entire clip into Skampoe, and all it does is piss him off. Now you are in trouble.

    Last edited by beautifulcock; 02-17-2013 at 04:35 PM.

  14. #239


    You stupid asshole. Formaldehyde is not PCP. You have smoked yourself into oblivion and now not even the sweet taste of PCP can get you high.
    This is not good. You need a new drug.

    Try Jenkem
    Try Krokodil
    Last edited by beautifulcock; 02-17-2013 at 04:35 PM.

  15. #240

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