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Thread: Religious Slaughter

  1. #1
    Gunfinga Infantry General Knok-A-Fella's Avatar
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    Default Religious Slaughter

    before u read this 16
    i was asked by a mate of mine to write a verse about religion but not how good it is but how bad it is
    i saw this as a challenge to test my lyricism so i accepted
    i mean no offence to anyone on this forum
    if u get offended by the verse please leave criticsim explainin ur problems
    ONCE AGAIN I APOLOGISE IF U GET OFFENDED

    greatest warriors of this world even the romans all fell
    there armies had there flaws like the crak in the liberty bell
    wen my service for this world is finished i gotta tell
    jesus reportin to u ive finished my sentence in hell
    on this plain of existence also known as a pilgrim
    if were all god sons doesnt that make all of us his children
    christianity is fallin like the twin tower buildings
    gods a murderer, ye thats right he kills things
    so u pathetic religious freaks get real feel the grievous
    effects of life just like roman julius ceasers
    wot the fuks so special about this bastard called jesus
    he didnt sacrifice his life they killed him with meat cleavers
    they poked holes thru his flesh like a tribeman savage
    leavin his soul to evaporate whilst the sun ravaged
    dont forget mary got pregnant there wasnt no marriage
    does that mean she wud have killed the savour if she had a micarriage

    Bless,1
    P.S: feedback is greatly appreciated


    my style and flow is dark like afghanistan dungeons//
    im about to blow up like seven parts of central london - Khrome Khaliba

    You beatin me is physically and psychological impossible// like paraplegic patients dreamin of walkin horizontal - Khrome Khaliba

    fuk a pregnant bitch my dicks so quik it makes sparks//
    dipped my dik in acid and left the baby with a birthmark - Khrome Khaliba

  2. #2
    Priceless:The Modern IsIs Dae Ja Nae's Avatar
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    Default Re: Religious Slaughter

    Quote Originally Posted by Knok-A-Fella
    before u read this 16
    i was asked by a mate of mine to write a verse about religion but not how good it is but how bad it is
    i saw this as a challenge to test my lyricism so i accepted
    i mean no offence to anyone on this forum
    if u get offended by the verse please leave criticsim explainin ur problems
    ONCE AGAIN I APOLOGISE IF U GET OFFENDED

    greatest warriors of this world even the romans all fell
    there armies had there flaws like the crak in the liberty bell
    wen my service for this world is finished i gotta tell
    jesus reportin to u ive finished my sentence in hell
    on this plain of existence also known as a pilgrim
    if were all god sons doesnt that make all of us his children
    christianity is fallin like the twin tower buildings
    gods a murderer, ye thats right he kills things
    so u pathetic religious freaks get real feel the grievous
    effects of life just like roman julius ceasers
    wot the fuks so special about this bastard called jesus
    he didnt sacrifice his life they killed him with meat cleavers
    they poked holes thru his flesh like a tribeman savage
    leavin his soul to evaporate whilst the sun ravaged
    dont forget mary got pregnant there wasnt no marriage
    does that mean she wud have killed the savour if she had a micarriage

    Bless,1
    P.S: feedback is greatly appreciated
    Non taken ... but Damn ... and I mean damn!! This was some harsh isht ... written from a very dark perspective. However, from a lyrical POV, I would have to say it's very sound and well thought out. Your delivery was very powerful, eventhough it really made me, as a reader, take a couple of steps back to wonder if you really feel this way. All in all ... nice work.

    Peace




    I sew...
    beautiful seeds that sprout flowers thatís deeply rooted
    your weak style-diluted with concepts thatís so polluted
    my words flourish, creating jewels the conscious will cherish ...

    -- Dae Ja Nae

    http://www.soundclick.com/daejanae
    http://wutangcorp.com/showthread.php?t=11503


  3. #3
    Deadly Venom 100pr00f's Avatar
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    Default Re: Religious Slaughter

    yea u got some sick lines keep posten

  4. #4
    Gunfinga Infantry General Knok-A-Fella's Avatar
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    Default Re: Religious Slaughter

    fanx for the criticism

    appreciated
    keep the feedback comin

    Bless, 1


    my style and flow is dark like afghanistan dungeons//
    im about to blow up like seven parts of central london - Khrome Khaliba

    You beatin me is physically and psychological impossible// like paraplegic patients dreamin of walkin horizontal - Khrome Khaliba

    fuk a pregnant bitch my dicks so quik it makes sparks//
    dipped my dik in acid and left the baby with a birthmark - Khrome Khaliba

  5. #5
    Taoist Saint GuardianOne's Avatar
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    Default Re: Religious Slaughter

    I don't think you fully expressed what you wanted (not on a personal view though)i mean lyrically. And you just kept to one moment in time (or history that is) Miracles, saints, tribes, holy things, unknown fathers (children who don't know their real parents), covered up stories, how people always want to make their side seem better.



    Hey why do you think there's punishment, sin, firgiveness, heaven and hell. Everyone knows people are a problem ( why do you think there's so much )?



    Work on it, the more specific (the better you will progress in your content). And i thought you kept using the same general knowledge. Investigate some info, get more broad! But i don't think you took the challenge of the topic,correct me if iam wrong?

    I hope it makes any sense. But nice try, we expect more posts from you (and that's on any subject also)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Peace

  6. #6
    Gunfinga Infantry General Knok-A-Fella's Avatar
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    Default Re: Religious Slaughter

    that was the challenge set by my frend

    to use only the information i know myself

    as im not the religious type man

    but fanx for the criticism

    Bless,1


    my style and flow is dark like afghanistan dungeons//
    im about to blow up like seven parts of central london - Khrome Khaliba

    You beatin me is physically and psychological impossible// like paraplegic patients dreamin of walkin horizontal - Khrome Khaliba

    fuk a pregnant bitch my dicks so quik it makes sparks//
    dipped my dik in acid and left the baby with a birthmark - Khrome Khaliba

  7. #7
    Are U aware I ban @ will? MASTER PAI MEI's Avatar
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    Default Re: Religious Slaughter

    This is a work in progress
    please go over it and get even deeper
    I know this is good work but I also know you can elaborate
    PEACE nice script!!

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