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Thread: Auset Libation

  1. #1
    Lord of the Perfect Black
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    Default Auset Libation

    As the well fills up to its rim it seems grim
    when you're hanging on to life by a limb holding a limb
    ducts burst, crystalline prism droplets from your optics
    every level seems to crumble, whether micro or macroscopic
    understand the entire planet bows down to your presence
    Illuminati illumination lacks the purity of your essence
    they named the fame city of France for you, Per Isis
    then dismantled you holistically with imperial devices
    even as the earth cries in acid rain pain
    you're the physical embodiment of exactly the same thing
    so when the rain falls in streams from the pinholes of your windows
    just imagine my whisper, kiss your face, Queen, when the wind blows
    alcoholic libation blocks the left brain from functionin
    right brain intuition's what you crave, so you get drunk again
    logic and reason led to all the bloodshed
    while universal law under Ma'at remains stead
    so if you feel a little blue, understand about the hue
    it's a temporary illusion, caused by diffusion
    of droplets bending light for the appearance of saphire
    you're the one I admire, supplier of the last fire
    Kundalini to scorch and cleanse the body of the earth
    and together we can bring about the dawn of a new birth
    even though humanity is groomed to be doomed
    we'll resurrect and be reborn through your beautiful womb
    We are already dead, and are replaying our lives at the judgment.

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  2. #2
    Taoist Saint GuardianOne's Avatar
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    Default Re: Auset Libation

    Its an interesting verse, has this ringing flow to it. And it kind of swayed forward in its follow. Nice effect. But try not to make the last word be very important in your rhyme it looses the effect ( or power) the verse has. Cause it seems the sentence (or rhyme)is pushed to the last word (that is suppose to have a large impact-knowledge wise) but then it turns out to be just part of the verse. Work on that. But its a nice style-knowledgeable but contains its fair share of creative mix. And well placed also (kind of gives that drifting effect)

    Peace
    PS: Keep posting

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