once upon a time in shaolin - buy the book now!
Results 1 to 4 of 4

Thread: just a quicky

  1. #1

    Default just a quicky

    im perverted it seems, since the lord deserted my dreams
    im always broke,dont provoke if its worth it i'll scheme
    kick the real shit ya couldnt deal wit, a mercilous feind
    i write the tragic ,servin emcess, wit a side of salad,
    the styles tip top, i make hip hop my bride for marriage
    you tried to manage, but couldnt disguise the damage
    you guys have had it,
    im the headless horseman of rap, enforcin my facts
    leavin contortions on cats, n straight scorchin the wack
    half of yall traded in ya skills for a porsche and a gatt
    fuck poppin lead im choppin heads like swordsmen in fact
    the last real rapper, im the unheard myth that you fear
    you strickened in fear when my names whispered in ears
    more bite than bark turn light to dark n cause mass panic
    lookin for a fight to start with a mic in grasp, i blast faggets

    just a lil verse
    tryin to elevate ya know

  2. #2
    1% Robert's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    The Invisible College
    Posts
    7,371
    Rep Power
    57

    Default Re: just a quicky

    Nice verse homie, your flow and rhymes were good for the most part. However, the fiend to salad part didn't flow for me, I thought it over in my head and it seemed too abrupt, nah mean? Overall, good verse with the flow a little uneaven at times
    peace












  3. #3
    The ABBOTT noel411's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Location
    Australia
    Age
    35
    Posts
    5,662
    Rep Power
    55

    Default Re: just a quicky

    Nice little piece. Short and simple, well constructed. Some pretty decent word play. Not a bad effort.


    THE LORD noel411 HAS A NEW ALBUM OUT!!! Czech it out here...

    http://www.wutang-corp.com/forum/sho...80#post2575080

    Suck this drunk alcohol dick.

  4. #4

    Default Re: just a quicky

    wordplay was aight, better than most of the drops here, overall it was a nice piece, but try to make your lines shorter

Similar Threads

  1. What do you like Better Monkey Barz OR chemistry
    By R3beLuTionAry in forum Hip-Hop Shop
    Replies: 18
    Last Post: 07-21-2005, 10:43 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •