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Old 05-18-2011, 10:14 AM   #1
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Default New Mayan Calender Announced!

A new Mayan calender was announced this morning at the Calendar Makers Association annual meeting. Ancestor elders from the Mayan tribes met to discuss details on the new calender. Called on by all the apocalyptic movies and panic over the end of the world, or to dispel rumors of a widespread change of "universal" consciousness, the elders addressed the reason why the calender ended so abruptly.

"Are ancestors just ran out of room on the stone slab." Said one elder.

"It wasn't convenient to have many stone slabs hanging on your walls." Said another elder.

When asked about the rumors of a change in spirituality and universal consciousness one elder said:

"Universal what? Fat people will be fat people. Skinny people will be skinny. White people white, black people black, purple people purple. There's nothing new under the Sun."

The new calender is said to go even farther beyond that of the original calendar so that you won't have to buy a new one for another 100,000 years. The calendar will be released in a new traditional marble format along with several digital formats including an app for iPod touch. It will also feature "The Hotties of Central America" a slide show for each month that displays the winner of "The Hotties of Central America Calender Contest." Both Male and Female versions are planned. The calender will be updated monthly using "Atomic Clock Radio Technology" downloading updates from satellites or by using a wi-fi internet connection.

In response to the question of whether the world was going to end. One elder siad:

"As long as we're making calenders, we can guarantee the world will not end or you get your money back."
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Old 05-18-2011, 04:04 PM   #2
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I know i'm getting me one!
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Old 05-18-2011, 08:13 PM   #3
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Hahahaha
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Old 05-18-2011, 11:55 PM   #4
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I would like to see what the new calendar looks like.
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Old 05-19-2011, 02:36 AM   #5
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which new mayan calender?
you do realise they had over 17 'calenders' ( devices to measure )

the tzolkin that ends on dec 21st 2012, is a device that measures earths orbit, in our solar system, and the solar systems orbit of the universe,

the 2012 dec 21st, we will have done a huge circle, thats all the mayans are saying,.

the end of the world bullshit is off of movies/religious sects. no where in any many glypths does it say the end of the world is dec 21st 2012,.

my mayan thread is to do with another device the mayans used to calculate human consciousness.
thats why i made the mayan thread lol
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Old 05-20-2011, 02:00 PM   #6
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I would like to see what the new calendar looks like.
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Old 05-20-2011, 02:32 PM   #7
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Since we use the Roman Calendar we don't have to worry about the world ending. Roman Anno Domini Calendar ends in (M)(M)(M)(D)(C)(C)(C)(L)(X)(X)(X)(V)MMMDCCCLXXXVII I

Or the Year 3 million, eight hundred and eighty eight thousand, eight hundred and eighty eight...
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Old 05-20-2011, 04:10 PM   #8
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that has to be fake, none of the females are from the mayan/south/central american region

i deem this a fake.,
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Old 05-21-2011, 10:51 PM   #9
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that has to be fake, none of the females are from the mayan/south/central american region

i deem this a fake.,
What you talking about? These chicks are clearly a blend of hotties in the south and central America. A lot has changed in that past 500 years kid.

Are you really going to stereo type people in the western hemisphere? That's mad racist son.
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Old 05-22-2011, 12:49 AM   #10
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only the best calenders got bitches in em. wouldn't it make sense that if you was gonna revise 'time' ... that you should 'get with the times'? Maybe I'm wrong here. Thats where they fucked up at on the old one , wasn't no bitches on it.
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Old 05-22-2011, 03:30 AM   #11
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What you talking about? These chicks are clearly a blend of hotties in the south and central America. A lot has changed in that past 500 years kid.

Are you really going to stereo type people in the western hemisphere? That's mad racist son.

I do not think im stereo typing, or being rascist.. lol

but really,, i prefer my mayan women in more traditional garms
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Old 05-23-2011, 09:51 AM   #12
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I do not think im stereo typing, or being rascist.. lol

but really,, i prefer my mayan women in more traditional garms
Damn kid,

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"I prefer my manyan women in more traditional garms"
Native women cant participate in this new age of comfortable fitting clothes?

So if she's not decked out in traditional regalia, she must not be a native woman? Is this what i'm hearing? The woman should be wearing some kind of old home made garments for your viewing pleasure?

Because Natives didn't participate in the evolution of the buckskin g-string to victoria secrets?

What you want native people to jump around in traditional garments so you can take pictures and make fun.

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I do not think im stereo typing, or being rascist.. lol
uh huh. Cuz you prefer your native, specifically mayan woman, in native garments. Sick pervert.
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Old 05-23-2011, 03:05 PM   #13
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LOL

yes native mayan women, and other women around the globe can also participate,.

well by tradional garments i meant, leaves, bush's,. maybe some big flowers as bra's or maybe coconut shells...

i really dont like girls in g strings.. with out under garments is fine,. i prefer to imagine more,,. than to physically see.. lol

i would not make fun of the natives!! im sure they;d make fun of me, if i was in my speedo's or boxers.. or my sexy purple male thong..

i am a sick pervert tho.. not my fault.. i blame my ex's ( one was a native american girl from oklahoma )

i really wanted to show im not rascist, and choose one of the girls on the cover of the new mayan calender... but i dont think i can choose anyway.. here;s why

girl 1 (on the left) looks like a reptillian.. teachings from other cultures have shown, not to fuck with reptiles.. i might end up like louis. also.. i think she has problems.. as her bike.. is facing the wrong way.

girl 2... i dont like white women much.. they gota be.. extra special (perverted) for me to show interest.. but id choose her out the 5 on the cover.. but ill give it a miss as.. she doesnt look like she is ready for universal consciousness and to co create.. as she has a really shit car in the background, plus ii think she is lieing bout her age.. as her tits are sagging like crazy

girl 3 wtf is wrong with her.. this mayan beauty (?) sold out,. and is on a motor bike? and why isnt her hair naturally wavey/curly.. why the fuck has she burnt her hair to bits, trying to keep it straight.. i want nappy hair!


girl 4. she scares the fuck outa me.. also ithink she has the new new mayan calender tattood on her right breast

girl 5.. is too happy.. i want a natural girl without the prozac and ridilin

their must be 7 other girls in the calender.. hope they improove!
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Old 05-23-2011, 03:20 PM   #14
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Originally Posted by soul controller View Post
LOL

yes native mayan women, and other women around the globe can also participate,.

well by tradional garments i meant, leaves, bush's,. maybe some big flowers as bra's or maybe coconut shells...

i really dont like girls in g strings.. with out under garments is fine,. i prefer to imagine more,,. than to physically see.. lol

i would not make fun of the natives!! im sure they;d make fun of me, if i was in my speedo's or boxers.. or my sexy purple male thong..

i am a sick pervert tho.. not my fault.. i blame my ex's ( one was a native american girl from oklahoma )

i really wanted to show im not rascist, and choose one of the girls on the cover of the new mayan calender... but i dont think i can choose anyway.. here;s why

girl 1 (on the left) looks like a reptillian.. teachings from other cultures have shown, not to fuck with reptiles.. i might end up like louis. also.. i think she has problems.. as her bike.. is facing the wrong way.

girl 2... i dont like white women much.. they gota be.. extra special (perverted) for me to show interest.. but id choose her out the 5 on the cover.. but ill give it a miss as.. she doesnt look like she is ready for universal consciousness and to co create.. as she has a really shit car in the background, plus ii think she is lieing bout her age.. as her tits are sagging like crazy

girl 3 wtf is wrong with her.. this mayan beauty (?) sold out,. and is on a motor bike? and why isnt her hair naturally wavey/curly.. why the fuck has she burnt her hair to bits, trying to keep it straight.. i want nappy hair!


girl 4. she scares the fuck outa me.. also ithink she has the new new mayan calender tattood on her right breast

girl 5.. is too happy.. i want a natural girl without the prozac and ridilin

their must be 7 other girls in the calender.. hope they improove!
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Old 05-23-2011, 11:32 PM   #15
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Bahahahahahahaha
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