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Old 11-20-2013, 05:34 PM   #1
IrOnMaN
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Exclamation Nurse reveals the top 5 regrets people make on their deathbed

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For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives. People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality.

I learnt never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.

When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:


1.)
I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

2.) I wish I didn’t work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3.) I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way,you win.

4.) I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5.) I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again. When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.
http://www.karenstan.net/2013/11/11/nurs...a15Nk.dpuf
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Old 11-20-2013, 07:50 PM   #2
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My number one regret in life is not fucking Jessica Law when I was 14. I had a crush on her from the moment I saw her on my first day of high school. She was a beautiful brunette with amazing blue eyes and big tits even when she was 12. We became good friends in year 9 and it became obvious she had a crush on me, and she even thought we were an item at one point, but I was too big a pussy to do anything about it.

She had a rough upbringing and as a result had personal problems and would without a doubt have been quick to give up the pussy. I have absolutely no doubt at all that I could have fucked her if I'd had the balls. That shit would have set me up for a much better life than the one I've had.

Biggest regret of my life.
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Old 11-20-2013, 11:17 PM   #3
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Im actually texting the biggest regret of my life right now....
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Old 11-20-2013, 11:25 PM   #4
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I heard on the radio once, that the biggest regret a lot of people have when they are older, but not necessarily on their death bed, was not being a kinder person.
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Old 11-21-2013, 08:55 AM   #5
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That article has been rehashed dozens of times hahaha
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Old 11-21-2013, 09:33 AM   #6
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Kinda sad to read. Makes you reflect on your own life and see where you are at in that spectrum.
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Old 11-21-2013, 10:15 AM   #7
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i dont keep in touch with many people and i dont like the phone, so i'm slacking on #4 but for the most part i been living YOLO since 76.
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Old 11-21-2013, 10:58 AM   #8
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you only love one
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Old 11-21-2013, 11:16 AM   #9
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^^ BB!

Yo, I used to lack in all them shits! lol But thankfully I'm slowly but surely shedding all that stuff.

But as far as #4 I don't know many people who won't have that regret in the end. I know that with everywhere I've been and all the people I've met and befriended there is no fucking way I can remember to keep in touch with ALL my friends. But I'll be able to RIP knowing that I made my best effort to just stay connected to the ones that matter.
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Old 11-21-2013, 11:38 AM   #10
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Well #4 can be done easily with Facebook.

Everyone is on that.
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Old 11-21-2013, 12:19 PM   #11
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Not EVERYBODY. There are some people I'd really like to regain touch with that I have yet to track down. While on the other hand, everyone who has ever annoyed the fuck outta me has sent me a friend request.
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Old 11-21-2013, 03:05 PM   #12
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Bwahahahahaah^ Use facebook to annoy them. Its only right. LMAO
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Old 11-21-2013, 03:11 PM   #13
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what a bunch of whiny faggits.




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Old 11-21-2013, 06:07 PM   #14
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