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Old 05-09-2009, 04:46 AM   #1
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Default Nick Cannon declares war on Eminem - Funny shit

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Well, well, well. Fresh off the plane with my wife from our second honeymoon on the beautiful secluded islands of the Maldives and what do I find in my email box? A mediocre (at best) Eminem record that sounds like it was written in 2001. At first I thought it was old material that had been dug up from when dude ďfantasizedĒ about having a pretend fling with Mariah. I was thinking to myself, ďHey that was before me so it is really none of my business, so Iím going to give him a pass.Ē

So as I continued to semi enjoy Marshallís rhyme scheme and flow, I mean letís be honest dude used to be incredible. He was a witty lyrist with dope delivery and timing. Some even say, one of the best to ever do it. I had nothing but respect for this dude. But all of a sudden I hear my name in the verse! My first reaction was like, ďThis is his new shit??? Wow, thatís too badÖĒ Then I felt sorry for him because he must really be stuck in the past. Not only has his music not evolved, but also homeboy is still obsessed with my wife, the same female that wouldnít let him get to second base from 8 years ago! He even describes his desperate lameness in this bad excuse for storytelling track. Thatís some real middle school shit right there! (What type of grown ass man lies about getting with a chick) Only Slim Lamey! LOL!

So as I further examine the track, I hear dude cross the line. He begins to call my wife out of her name! Now as yíall know, I donít take that type of nonsense lightly. So on some grown man shit Iím instantly like, I got to get at this Lame. I know itís only entertainment and Iím all for freedom of speech. But Iím from the school of thought where if you are tough enough to talk shit, you got to be tough enough to deal with the consequences that come with tough guy shit talking! Then the little angel on my shoulder said, ďNo Nicholas, there is no need to play into his negativity. He is just a troubled soul yearning for the lost spotlight. You must be Christ like and turn the other cheekĒ

But then the dude on the other shoulder said, ď What Nigga?! Is you scared?! You canít let no man ever disrespect your wife! Especially not some Peroxide drenched homophobic has-been! This is like some Paquiao vs. Hatton shit! He is underestimating you with his ass out and you can drop him in the first round!Ē

Then, without listening to either one of the voices on my shoulders, I analyzed the situation from a logical perspective. Am I going to battle Eminem and try to out rap him? No, that would be stupid. The dude is nice on the mic. Even though nowadays he lacks substance, rapping about when he used to be hot. Like when Al Bundy gloats about his High school football prime.

Then I asked myself should I go find this Bitch and just whoop his little ass? But that might have just been the Creatine and protein shakes talking! LOL. Even though most people donít know that Iím nice in the ring and have been training in boxing and Martial Arts for years that would just be childish and silly of me to bully this dude. He clearly has been picked on all his life and I would hate to add to his deep-rooted pain. As we all know he has had a hard life and has major insecurity issues and is very confused and unhappy with himself. So a guy like that doesnít really need another ass whoopin, he needs a hug. We should really pray for his troubled heart.

So just when the good guy in me is about to emerge and shine through, something hits meÖ Something bigger than rap beefs, something bigger than jealousy infused insults, something bigger than lackluster attention seeking punchlines, something bigger than artistic expression. I realized, that this so-called man has just disrespected and slanderized one of the worldís most significantly influential artists, one of the most notable BLACK females of our time, the incredibly cherished, globally loved and world-embraced woman of color, Mariah Carey!

Some people may not realize or tend to forget that my wife is a Black woman. And she has had enough difficulty in her life dealing with racial and ethnicity issues. Believe it or not, Mariah is the same racial mixture as our beloved president Barack Obama. [Black Father + White Mother= BLACK]

Maybe Iím going too far, but I thought we got passed the days where white men could spew vulgar obscenities at our beautiful queens and get away with it. Whatís next? Are we going to let this trash say something horrible about our lovely first lady, Mrs. Michelle Obama? Or would Marshall have talked sideways out of his neck like this about Oprah Winfrey? This act of racist bigotry cannot go unnoticed. Calling my wife a ďcuntĒ and a ďwhoreĒ is way worse than anything Don Imus could have ever said. So trust, repercussions will be served. Anybody got Al Sharptonís number?! LOL

Letís not forget about Eminemís amateur mixtape rants of calling African Americans Nigger and how he hates ďBlack BitchesĒ. How did we let him get away with that in the first place?! He is a natural born racist in disguise. Someone tell this coward that he finally barked up the wrong tree. For his entire career he strategically only tried to beef with people he could bully. I mean, what real man picks fights with women? Real MCís battle other real MCís. Ask Nas, ask Jay Z, you didnít see them starting beefs with women! That is truly some punk shit!

So Iím putting this out there now. Marshall Mathers, you need to holler at me on some grown man shit. Man to man, letís meet up and deal with this like adults. This is my invitation to you, whenever and wherever you like sir. So when you come out of your introverted hiding place and ask your bodyguards if you can go out and play by yourself, Iím here Pimp!

Your blatant disrespect not just to Black women but ALL women in general must stop. You are a despicable excuse for a man. I canít even see how you can call yourself a father! Imagine if someone said half the stuff you say about women to your daughter, Hayley. (And Iím pretty sure they will because you got it coming Marshall.) Thatís how Karma works.

You sold your little records and made a little bit of change but now you are stepping in the wrong territory. You may have been able to rape and pillage our artform like an old school Caucasian con man and nobody said anything because we respected your talent, but now youíve made the ultimate mistake. Donít you know that the black woman is the foundation and the strongest force in our culture? Take notes homey, Elvis would have never disrespected Aretha Franklin or Diana Ross. You were supposed to just do your little song and dance, make your little racist money and call it a day. But no, you had to dishonor the black manís most precious counterpart.

Iím taking full action on you Eminem. I donít know why no one has stood up to your bitch ass yet. But I guess itís going to take a corny, wack rapping, boy toy from Nickelodeon to set you straight. And trust, I am going to be relentless. Even though I got a lot of other obligations and occupations, you are my new full time job ďhomeyĒ! As a matter of fact I think you going to bring my wack rhymes out of retirement! Thatís right haters; you can thank Eminem because Iím going to start rapping again! LOL Just for him! And donít forget about the jokes! We coming at you hard body!! Non-stop on your Manic-depressive-Insecure-Maclovin-Nazi- Liza Minelli haircut havin-lookin ass!! [Pause] Thatís what I do all day Bitch!

So Miss Marshall, Iím going to make you wish you never spoke my name and regret the ungodly things you said about my wife. This is going to be fun! Itís however you want it! Just remember, you did this to yourself! Your legacy has now been tainted from this day forth! You will now be known as the rapper who lost to Corny-ass Nick Cannon!!!
From his blog
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Old 05-09-2009, 04:59 AM   #2
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haha is this for real?
if it is, nick is 100% right nobody should take this shit.
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Old 05-09-2009, 05:07 AM   #3
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idiot.

this is going to end badly.
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Old 05-09-2009, 05:19 AM   #4
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LOL at this clown.... He talks bout Eminem takin' shit from the past or something , but this nigga is talkin' bout some dumbass tape from when Eminem was 15 and said some shit bout a black girl.
And ow yeah Mariah Carey ain't black. She's coloured or something but she sure ain't black , I've never understood why people called her "black".

LOL Nick cannon is really a stupid clown, I hate nigga's like that.
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Old 05-09-2009, 05:24 AM   #5
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God damn, I'm on Nick Cannon's side. I hate Nick's career but he's 100% right about Eminem. He's a has-been, he's a sellout, he's a woman-hater, he's probably bisexual or something with all the buttrape and crossdress rap and he's taken the spotlight from a ton of better black rappers. I try to not hate on Relapse, but Eminem comes off so pathetic throughout that bullshit song. Eminem can't defend himself in this argument. He's being a chump.
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Old 05-09-2009, 05:26 AM   #6
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"racist bigotry"

LOOOOOOOOOOL!!!!!!!
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Old 05-09-2009, 05:26 AM   #7
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lol, clearly somebody doesn't understand what is Em doing
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Old 05-09-2009, 05:36 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Afficial_Nastee View Post
LOL at this clown.... He talks bout Eminem takin' shit from the past or something , but this nigga is talkin' bout some dumbass tape from when Eminem was 15 and said some shit bout a black girl.
And ow yeah Mariah Carey ain't black. She's coloured or something but she sure ain't black , I've never understood why people called her "black".

LOL Nick cannon is really a stupid clown, I hate nigga's like that.
C'mon. If somebody said "Hispanic women ain't shit" when they were 15, you still have to think what kind of man is he now saying some foul shit like that back then.

And the reason biracial people are thought of as black is because a cop doesn't look at them driving down the highways and think "Hmmm? She's half-white. I won't fuck her over" Racists just see you as black.
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Old 05-09-2009, 06:01 AM   #9
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Originally Posted by samtheseed View Post
C'mon. If somebody said "Hispanic women ain't shit" when they were 15, you still have to think what kind of man is he now saying some foul shit like that back then.

And the reason biracial people are thought of as black is because a cop doesn't look at them driving down the highways and think "Hmmm? She's half-white. I won't fuck her over" Racists just see you as black.
Eminem grew up between black people, he's from Detroit a city with more Black People than white ( I guess more than 70 % is Black) and on top of it he made it in an all black (well, back then it was) culture : so how the fuck could he be racist? And bout that tape : it was just some dumb stuff when he was 15 and it seems that he had a bad experience with a black girl that's where that tape comes from (like it actually matters).... For your information he has stated that his favourite pornstar is a black girl and The Bad Meets Evil LP features two black girls on the cover (again, like it actually matters).

And Mariah Carey doesn't look like a mulatto neither, she looks hispanic in my opinion.
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Old 05-09-2009, 06:04 AM   #10
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why the fuck does he try to turn this into a white man raping a black woman thing.. mariah carrey is whiter than thea anywayz.
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Old 05-09-2009, 06:15 AM   #11
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why the fuck does he try to turn this into a white man raping a black woman thing.. mariah carrey is whiter than thea anywayz.
Haha exactly.....
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Old 05-09-2009, 06:25 AM   #12
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mariah looks white to me

nick cannon calling eminem out on racism cuz he called mariah a bitch or whatever is just fuckin stupid...he never called her a black nothin..sure, ok, he's pissed cuz it didn't work with mariah, so fuckin what...nick's just pissed cuz a "white" dude does what a "black" dude is supposed to be better at 485308589843754 times better than he does..if nick cannon releases a diss track to eminem, i don't expect em to respond cuz he's way passed that shit, especially with some wack ass wannabe like nick cannon...em went after ja rule when ja was in his prime (like it matters anyway, but whatever) and now, that nigga's got NOTHING..same with benzino, he had nothin but the source and that tape where eminem says black women are biteches behind him and now he doesn't even have that...he fucked with canibus who was at one point held as one of the best battle rappers alive and now that dude is another NOTHING

nick don't want it with em...he says he's gonna go back to rappin just to diss eminem and if em ever decides to bomb back, its fucking over
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Old 05-09-2009, 06:34 AM   #13
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Originally Posted by Afficial_Nastee View Post
Eminem grew up between black people, he's from Detroit a city with more Black People than white ( I guess more than 70 % is Black) and on top of it he made it in an all black (well, back then it was) culture : so how the fuck could he be racist? And bout that tape : it was just some dumb stuff when he was 15 and it seems that he had a bad experience with a black girl that's where that tape comes from (like it actually matters).... For your information he has stated that his favourite pornstar is a black girl and The Bad Meets Evil LP features two black girls on the cover (again, like it actually matters).

And Mariah Carey doesn't look like a mulatto neither, she looks hispanic in my opinion.
I'm familiar with the song and I don't think he's being racist. But he should be smart enough to know those remarks will always haunt him. He accidently let the world know what he thinks (or thought) of black women. And he should know how dumb it looks dissing a female icon of black music. Plain and simple.Bitching about female singers, white or black, not giving you play is just a sissy act.

And liking black porn stars means nothing. Plenty of racist whites still want to fuck black women. Again, I don't think Em is like that though. He still needs to handle this gracefully. This has nothing to do with race, man. You don't diss a man's wife and expect him to just forget about it. Nick Cannon has nothing to lose calling out Em, Nick's a joke. But any real man is going to be on Nick's side for that cheap swipe. And Nick is ready to publicly state all of the stuff alot of hip-hop fans already feel about Eminem being a has-been.
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Old 05-09-2009, 06:59 AM   #14
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If a guy who fucked with your girl way back when is still dissing her and then disses you for no reason, that guy deserves a broken jaw. Just because the asshole is Eminem and the guy being dissed is Nick Cannon, its suddenly okay. Yeah, Em will murder him on record. But he still a cunt for saying the shit in the first place. Thats what this is all about. Eminem needs to shut the fuck up. He tries to start beef now with any lameass like Nick Cannon, despite the fact that HE's being the bitch in the situation.

This isn't about rap, skill or race. Nick Cannon is just a biatch and played that up. People are probably just going to keep repeating "Em will MURDER him". Nick already said that. Great rapper or not, Eminem needs to stop pulling these bitch moves.
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Old 05-09-2009, 07:03 AM   #15
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"[Black Father + White Mother= BLACK]"

wut?
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